December 1st, 2017 | 2 Comments | Posted in Survivor 35 - H vs. H vs H

The tribe heads back to camp and Chrissy wants an explanation of what just happened. While Mike and Joe are just happy to stick around a while longer, no one is inclined to tell Chrissy how this epic blindside was orchestrated. Joe does what Joe does best and starts talking smack, but can you blame him? She’s almost demanding she be told what happened – like she’s still one of the leaders of Mag 7 – but now she’s just one of the 3 Flunkies…and one of the Flunkies is a double agent! So, there’s really only two Flunkies!

She confesses how upset she is, but is more annoyed at how they’re being treated right now. Later, she asks for an explanation on another aspect of the blindside, but Devon just responds he’s not gonna say s**t. She laments that while blindsides are part of the game, “being snarky to your friends is not,” and I’m just wondering what she’d say about this website. And BTW, being snarky is part of the game…if that’s how you wanna play.

This isn’t Survivor: Suburbs where everyone brings a potluck dish to the island and wears khakis. The men aren’t all middle-aged white dudes getting fatter (some are), and the women aren’t all drinking wine at 10am and fantasizing about the pool boy. It’s just funny that Chrissy thinks she deserves respect for how she’s played so far.

Ryan, on the other hand, is also pissed but savvy enough to not show it to the others. He knows he’ll need to figure out how to rebuild his game, and is really bummed he’s now on the bottom of the tribe. Funny how the game does that sometimes…

Ben is playing the perfect role of the double-agent, talking back to Joe and making it seem like he’s butthurt about the blindside, and thankfully, everyone in the Burger Alliance is in on it. Otherwise, I could see someone not understanding what a double-agent is and start wondering if Ben is telling the truth. That’s possible, right? But he’s getting a little perturbed that Joe is claiming he had something to do with the J.P. vote, where in fact, he just did as he was told. Ben is getting frosty…

Lauren, Ashley and Ben steel away to have a quick confab about things, and they essentially confirm their plan worked perfectly, and the game has flipped. Most importantly, Ben is going to keep collecting intel and will find a way to have Ryan play his idol next Tribal, which will tip the scales even more toward the Burger Alliance.

Devon heads off to build a mini fire and Ryan comes over to chat with his old Hustler buddy. Ryan says he’s not angry at the surfer, but what else could he say? Devon divulges the only reason he blindsided the bellhop is because of the loss of trust he felt at not being the only person who knew about Ryan’s idol. Ryan continues to state he did nothing wrong, but knows the damage is done. Devon says he trusts Ashley and Lauren fully, but when it comes to crafting a plan to win the million dollars…

“[Ryan’s] no longer part of it.”

We’ve reached Day 28 and breakfast is served. Everyone grabs one small shell full of rice and that’s it. Devon is confessing he’s found his game plan, and is starting to get a little big for his britches. Methinks he’s starting to dig his own grave with these delusions of grandeur, but let’s see how much more he wants to dig.

He sits down to eat his rice with Ben and they’re looking forward to the rest of the game because they have the majority, know where the idols are, and with Lauren’s Secret Advantage, they’re virtually assured of getting to Final Four right now. They discuss who’s the next to go, and it appears to be between Chrissy and Joe. Devon’s preference is to lose Chrissy because “she’s a challenge threat.” Really…? Nothing about those big brains of her? Devon then utters the worst thing you can say in a confessional…

“I’m sitting in the best possible seat in this game.”

Ouch. Sayonara, surf boy… Editorial don’t like chutzpah.

It’s time for another Reward Challenge on the beach and Jeff describes it. I won’t detail the whole thing, because it’s late and I ran out of vodka an hour ago. Every keystroke is another reminder the liquor store is closing in 15 minutes, but I don’t think I wanna be the dad driving his son to school still partially drunk…

Teams are playing for a visit to the Survivor Spa, where they’ll grab a shower, get a massage, and then eat chicken, wraps, fruit, and pies. At random, the players will be split into two groups, row row row their boat, collect things, push things, and build a puzzle thing. And I think these teams are a little unfair:

Red Team

Blue Team
Seriously? Is this some sick joke? Can the Red Team just forfeit now and not waste all that energy? Has a whole team ever drowned during a challenge? Something tells me their boat may sink and we’ll need the Fijian Navy in here quick… Let’s see what happens.

-Blue takes the early lead (duh)
-Logs are heavy
-Ryan weighs less than the logs
-Blue’s lead is dwindling
-Lauren needs an ab roller…
-“Blue’s strength is coming into play”
-Red’s logs are backing up like Joe’s colon on Kaoh Rong…
-Lauren decides her boobs are worth destroying for a million bucks…
-Ben and Ashley work the puzzle…
-Mike and Chrissy for Red…
-Some Blue shifting allows Red to pull closer
-Jeff is talking a lot of crap on the sidelines, it’s getting tense!
-But no! Blue completes the puzzle a smidgen before Red.

And right now, I would usually make a comment about Ashley’s cheeky buttocks, but it just doesn’t seem right without a drink sitting next to my keyboard. I think I really need to reconsider my alcohol consumption…

Screw that! It’s one (or two) nights a week. Party on, Wayne. Party on, Garth…

And it looks like Joe believes his fortunes in the game have been reaffirmed. He’s feeling pretty good about himself right now.

“The tables have completely turned. It’s time to eat and get a massage.”

Later that day, Blue is chomping down on a feast and once again, Devon is feeling good about his game. It’s a 180° turnaround from his Schindler’s List days, which were only a couple days ago. He’s looking vibrant, alive, and may have put on a couple pounds. And with a shower and massage, you know that’ll do a body good.

But even though he’s recharging his batteries, he knows the game is still afoot and must maintain Ben’s “deposed king” ruse in front of Joe. Ben is actually enjoying his acting assignment, because it allows him to mess with Joe a little bit. Even when Ben starts asking questions – much like Chrissy was doing earlier – he sells the fact he’s totally on the outs, and Joe is buying everything Ben is selling.

He’s even confessing Ben “doesn’t know how to play this game without power and control.” Joe is suddenly an expert on how to play Survivor, and I’m thinking that since Joe’s only been in a “comfortable space” for about 16 hours, I’m not putting a lot of belief in what he’s saying.

However, Ben’s next comment opens a new can of worms,

“Well, hopefully I’m not next…”

Perhaps he’s selling this con a little too well, because Ashley is now telling us Ben is playing a “really good game…and that’s scary.” I think we may need to keep an eye on King Arthur for the rest of the episode.

While Ben and Joe are showering – separately, pervs! – Devon and Ashley are whispering back and forth about how similar their games are and they’re going to the end together. I think there are a lot of moving parts still left in the game, but let’s let the surfers ride this wave tandem. Ashley confesses her own feelings of a restart to her game, now that she’s made one big move and sitting in a power position.

“I honestly feel like this is my game to lose,” she stupidly portends. Why does everyone want to jinx themselves?

Back at Solewa, the Red team is looking beaten. They’re nibbling on roasted coconut and not much else. Ryan and Mike head off to the well together, and Ryan tells us he needs to try to bond with Mike because they’re both losers this season, and maybe that’ll unite them in some way.

Ryan mentions he’d like to work with the Penis Whisperer, but now that Mike is in a good place, he’s not interested in Ryan’s request. Ryan says he’d “like to work with him,” but Mike confesses he tried to work with Ryan for a week straight, and Ryan didn’t bite. And now that Ryan is on the bottom, he suddenly wants to work with Mike. Mike essentially tells the bellhop to go f**k himself, mostly because Ryan told him he wouldn’t vote for him, and then did last Tribal. So, Ryan, you can go f**k yourself…

Chrissy is also trying to spin a new web, but Lauren is having nothing to do with it. From her “hmm-hmm” responses to all of Chrissy’s questions, it’s obvious Lauren will NOT be working with the actuary anytime soon. And can I just say Thank God there hasn’t been any talk of a “all-girls” alliance, or an “all-guys” alliance!? I hate those…

Lauren motivates and builds a swing for the camp, but two things just became clear.

1. Chrissy feels that she, Ben and Ryan are the next ones to go.
2. Chrissy is looking very old this episode. What happened to her slo-mo walking on the beach body?


  1. “Choices can always be made”. I feel like you’re “Fisching” for comments by provoking readers. Consider me provoked.
    Let’s say I’m an actress. A 5’2, 120lb actress who bumped into an actor friend that I’ve done movies with in the past. We’ve hung out together plenty of times and are always friendly. He asks me up to his room to read lines with him and I think nothing of it since it’s something that’s happened in the past several times. Except this time he gets super aggressive, bolts the door and blocks it, shoves me into the bedroom and proceeds to rape me. Let’s say he’s asserting his size and I’m not as physically strong as him. What are my choices?
    I bet you’d say to report it. Only, let’s say this actor is an A lister and I’m a D lister. No one would believe me. People would think I’m lying or assume I’m over exaggerating or creating drama because “that’s what women do”. So I decide to cry it out and hold it in forever – because THAT’S what women truly do. So please don’t say “choices can always be made” – that is so unbelievably incorrect. On many levels (shooting victims, domestic violence victims, etc).
    On the other hand, I do think that all of the sexual harassment claims are getting out of hand and that they should be properly investigated, instead of getting leaked to the media and the accused losing their entire career. But I digress…
    It’s 2017. There are so many situations where choices are stripped away from us. There are so many abusers and criminals out there that think they can get away with bad behaviour. Even regular Joes. Hopefully this Hollywood Harassment holds a mirror up to society’s flaws and garners better appreciation and treatment of women, and illustrates that “choices” can often be a complete illusion.

  2. Lil-

    I’m gonna tread lightly because we’re talking about a very serious subject and I’m not just provoking readers for clickbait. As I’ve mentioned — many times — I don’t care how many people read my recaps. I just write…

    And I don’t know if you’re an actress or not, and may be personally invested in your scenario. That said, I’ll say this…

    Based on the situation you presented, I’m not gonna say you shouldn’t have gone to his room, because you were relatively comfortable with this person and thought it was a professional situation.

    But…if he raped you in that situation (per your words) I would say, hell yes, report that motherfucker. FYI, even if he’s an “A-lister” and you’re a “D-lister,” the law doesn’t give a shit about that. It’s a crime.

    The problem, I see, in your scenario is you assume this person is “above” you. He’s not. He’s just more famous. And as long as this “cult of celebrity” exists, people who’ve been victimized will suffer.

    The one thing I’ve always believed is that actors, famous or not, are just people. They just have a different job. Yet, as long as people keep putting them on a pedestal, celebs/execs/successful people will continue to get away with whatever they’re getting away with.

    Understand, I’m not arguing with you. I do think anyone who’s been an abuser deserves to be taken down…swiftly. TBH, I wouldn’t care if they’re personally injured…

    I don’t give a shit about ANYONE’s career being destroyed by recent allegations, because there’s probably some truth behind it. If not, I’m sure they can afford to hire an attorney to defend them. The one thing I’ve learned about a lot of successful people in Hollywood is they’re:


    …and none of those qualities are things I want to be associated with. Unfortunately, many people — actresses, assistants, fans — will look the other way when celebs are dicks because they wanna tell their friends, “I hung out with (A or B-lister) last night!”

    Who gives a fuck who you hung out with!? The fact you think you’re better off because you hung out with a celeb says a lot about you.

    Now I’m digressing. The point is, everyone needs to treat everyone else with respect. And everyone — even D-listers — need to realize the power they hold. Stop glorifying the cult of celebrity, and stop allowing the jerks in Hollywood to keep winning. Or GTFO…

    What we all need to realize is that more important than any of this Hollywood bullshit is the law. And until Hollywood realizes that — both high and low — they’ll continue to treat the meek like a commodity… Don’t be cattle.

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