Howdy, folks, your friendly neighborhood Fish here to offer up more sordid tales of dirty Americans in their underwear. Sounds like the makings of an adult film shot in my hometown (the “Valley”) where porn is king…queen…and two circle jerking jacks…

Sometimes I wish Survivor was as naughty as I am, but with all the top heavy religion on this show, you know that’ll never happen. Hell, this show hardly broaches the subject of sex (or being naughty) anymore, the closest thing being Heidi Strobel and Jenna flashing their titties 13 years ago. It’s been a long time since those days, and methinks that 8:00pm time slot – and CBS Standards & Practices – dictates the nature of the content, and Survivor is not one to play with fire. With 32 seasons “in the can,” they must be doing something right. Thank god. Or thank Jeff (he’s actually more important to me) they’re still re-inventing the wheel, as Second Chance has been a great season so far.

However, as you know, I will always be … Continue reading →

Welcome back, Survivor posse! We have a lot to get to tonight so buckle up and take your seats. It’s going to be a bumpy flight… Not only is there a supposedly awesome episode to review (per Jeff Probst) but I owed you the list of the Sh**tiest Survivors of All Time, and I have not disappointed…

But before we get to that, let’s discuss how amazing Gotham is once again. Spoilers and definitely ahead… We finally got to see Nigma figure out how he’ll dispose of Miss Kringle’s body, and were it not for an ill-timed visit by a wayward hunter, Miss Kringle would be old news. But, now Eddie-boy’s got three murders on his hands, needs to increase his meds, and needs to dig a bigger hole. Can’t wait to see how he and the Penguin hook up next week…

And The Walking Dead is back to being good. No more backstory episodes, please. It’s like they forgot to tell us something, or they just didn’t wanna pay all the actors that week. … Continue reading →

It’s getting colder outside (a parka-inducing 52° in Los Angeles), but things are warming up on TV! It’s Wednesday, it’s Cambodia, and it’s Survivor Second Chance! Let’s see what this Gilligan’s Island group of drama queens is up to this week…

But first, have to humbly take a rain check on the Shittiest Survivors of All Time list. I have the names, but I’m just not happy yet with the blurbs I’ve written. They need a little more time and with the late start I’m getting on tonight’s column, I don’t think I wanna write til 2am…

So what else do we have to look forward to? We know there’s a merge happening (or is there?), we know Kaos Kass is back (for how long?) and we know Savage is thanking the Survivor gods for mixing up the tribes again. How do I know this? I saw the promo video, didn’t you?

And in case you weren’t aware, today (Wednesday) is Jeff Probst’s birthday, so let’s all give a big shout out to the man … Continue reading →