December 19th, 2016 | 8 Comments | Posted in Survivor 33 - Millennials vs Gen X

It’s a bittersweet day, folks, because once again we have to say goodbye to our favorite show for a little while. But don’t despair, we can celebrate one last time. For tonight is the culmination of what some people are calling a great season of Survivor, while others – like me – are claiming it’s another season of “upside-down” Survivor gameplay.

Not sure how this one will play out, but one thing is certain, a good Final Tribal can make up for a lackluster season. Let’s hope all these attorneys, debate champs, and bitter castoffs will BRING IT tonight, or else I may have to start recapping The Walking Dead, Gotham, or Berlin Station from now one…

Seriously, you should check out Berlin Station…

So with a 2-hour (gulp!) episode, the reunion show, and then whatever else I find in the dark recesses of my mind, tonight’s column may get a little long in the tooth. So let’s not dilly-dally any longer, let’s crack open the final coconut in Season 33, Millidiots vs. Gen-XY.

Jeff opens the show in the nether regions of CBS Television City – I remember interviewing there so seeing this reminds me how much I hate CBS for never hiring me – and since he’s got to try something new, he’s going to take us by the craft service table to see all the junk food production people eat.

But no, he’s going to show off the well-kempt and showered cast, who are all dying to know if Figgy is going to punch Taylor, or bump uglies with him at the commercial breaks. They seem – cordial – but of course, Jeff has to pimp one of the S34 players (it’s not a spoiler when I’ve been saying it for weeks) and points out the nasty blindside of Michaela and how she exposed her immaturity and just how trashy she really is. Even when Jeff opens the door for her to say something to wash away all that negativity, all she can come up with is…

“I shore did,” when asked about leaving her shoes behind in a huff.

Well, I’m sure she’s going to do really well next season, Jeff. Nice call there, Casting Department.

Jeff then teases the transformations players went through this season, and I’m instantly wondering if they just cast insecure people who need to go through a transformation to make good TV. IDK, just a thought…

He tells us what’s in store tonight and asks us to send in questions to @JeffProbst, on Twitter during the episode. Hey, I have one…

.@JeffProbst Hey Jeff, love the show! Can you ask @PigStyHannah if she knows how to exfoliate? Or more importantly, does she have ablutophobia? Thanks, JP!
[def. Ablutophobia is the persistent, abnormal and unwarranted fear of bathing, washing, or cleaning. This phobia is a situational specific phobia.]

Okay, maybe that’s a little harsh…

He reminds us that this season can be won by any of the final 6 players, and when he shows off the live studio audience and tells us “tickets are still in demand” I’m wondering just how big a cut does Jeff get from every ticket and how does anyone GET a ticket to this thing. Because from what I’ve gathered, it’s only Survivor players’ family, CBS employees, or their families, or people who can afford to fork out bookoo dolares to take the afternoon off… But I’m not bitter…

To the episode!

A recap of past highlights reminds us that…

-Fiji is gorgeous
-Millennials are apathetic to everything
-Gen-Xers like to work, and complain
-Showing your tits gets you invited back to play another season (hear that, Jessica?)
-Fiji is dangerous
-Figtails is “bangerous” (just go with it!)
-Emotions will be running high tonight
-All gay men have dad bods…
-Gameplay, idols, rocks and blindsides ruled the season

We’re then given a montage of each player, but we already know these folks. We know their stories. Nothing new is provided.

Night 35 at Vinaka and the players have returned from Tribal Council. Jay is not so subtly reminded that his idol was flushed, and now he’s threadbare. He claims he wasn’t going to play it; yet can’t explain why he did. I’ll tell you why, because you never know in Survivor and he didn’t wanna go home looking like a dumbass (let’s see if that good luck continues tonight). But he’s determined to find an idol tomorrow, which he’s sure will be out there…

Bret shares a midnight chat with PigPen and can’t believe they didn’t take out David tonight. He compares it to having the opportunity to take out “Obama Lin Saden” (almost, Bret, almost…) and laments he’s working with morons… His targets are David and Jay, and confesses those two guys “are going to win this game.”

Later, when everyone’s fast asleep, David is channeling Joe and making a fake immunity necklace out of beads, shells, and some paint he got at the Mamanuca Home Depot. Not sure where he got that from, but I’m hoping someone out there can tell me it’s possible to make paint out of coconut milk, blood and jism…

Nevertheless, he makes something that looks nothing like any idol the show would ever manufacture, but I’m sure one of these fools is dumb enough – or delusional enough – to think they’ve found a real one. Let’s watch!

And right on cue, morning breaks and Jay is already looking for an idol. As he forages about, he’s joined by Ken and David who are evidently out looking for coconuts. Defeated, Jay picks up a few of his own to cover his search, but is keeping his eyes peeled for anything that may indicate an idol is near.

And whaddya know? Jay spots a pink triangle and thinks he just found an idol. Wasn’t he just saying he doesn’t want to look like a dumbass? To be honest, the emblem David painted on the coconut looks more like the North Carolina logo for gender neutral bathrooms, but it’s good enough for Day 36 on Survivor.

Jay makes his way back to the “coco-NOT” and is tickled pink he’s found another idol. He’s talking crap like he invented it and can’t wait to see the look on “those fools” faces when he drops this bomb. Yes, Jay, neither can we…

Later that day, Ken takes the opportunity to go read his Legacy Advantage clue in private – and how is he able to do that without alerting the others? – but has to put on his best jeans and shirt to do so. Looks like he’s going out on a date, or maybe he thinks the Advantage will be a Fantasy Suite reward with Nick Viall (Ken’s heard that guy is easy…).

But no, Ken just gets to read the note inside, which turns out to be guaranteed Immunity at the next Tribal Council. Wow. That’s huge. Now, I guess we’re all hoping he wins the next Immunity Challenge too so he can give it to David to garner more power in the game. But let’s just see what happens because something tells me I’m wrong again.

And off to the first Immunity we go and it’s a doozy. Players will race through a series of obstacles while collecting a bag of tiles. At a combination lock, the tiles will contain numbers that need to be entered, allowing a key to drop. When they grab their key, they should COVER THEIR NUMBERS so the other players can’t see, and race under a net, up a wall, and use the key to unlock a set of puzzle pieces. The puzzle hangs from above, which will make it difficult to assemble.

For the winner, Immunity at tonight’s Tribal Council, AND a Reward, which is a big steak dinner back at camp. Everyone starts foaming at the mouth, especially Jay… Jeff calls them to the line, and releases the hounds…Go!

Jay and Ken take the early lead and reach the combination lock first. With only 6 combinations possible, it shouldn’t take long to get it. Jay does get it first, grabs his key, and takes off – without covering up his numbers. Ooohh, bad move, dumbass.. Who’s the fool, now?

Immediately, the other players begin to head over to steal Jay’s thunder, but let’s see if he’s gotten enough of a lead to finish this off. Meanwhile, everyone is using Jay’s sequence to solve their own combination…all except David, who can’t seem to remember a simple set of 3 numbers. That’s okay, David, we just need you to write stuff, not remember stuff… But he’s still ahead of Adam, who’s dead last.

With only a small lead, Jay seems to not have something right as the gaps in his puzzle are glaring. David, however, is maniacally placing piece after piece, and has somehow taken the lead. Not sure what happened to everyone else, but David is about to win this thing. Just as Jay is about to place one of the last two pieces, the gaps in his fruit bat cause most of it to fall to the ground, giving David all the time he needs to complete the comeback. The Little Writer Who Could wins Immunity…and steak!

But hold on there, Kimo Slobby, just as Jeff places the necklace around David and says he’s getting T-boned tonight, Jay calls out…


And deftly uses the Reward Steal Adam gave him to snatch this one away from David at the last moment. But…because Jay “don’t play like that,” he allows David to join him, and then picks Adam to come along, since he gave him the reward. Not a bad choice, I’ll say. I’m sure everyone would have loved to partake but Jay did what he felt was just. Good on ya, kid…

“The game’s not over, until they say the game is over…”

When everyone gets back to camp, the three diners split off and head to a table set up nearby with steak, mashed potatoes and some hearty vegetables. Just what the doctor ordered on Day 36.

This meal also gives Jay an opportunity to talk turkey with the David and Adam about “getting rid of Bret, not me” because “I’m a shield for you guys, and I promise to take you both to final 3.” They all seem to agree Bret is a huge threat considering how many friends he has on the jury, and David confesses he’s liking what he’s hearing. According to Dave, Ken is his only ally, so he likes the idea of Jay serving as a shield for him. Adam just sits there, nodding, and eating…not revealing anything.

Back at camp, the other three are discussing how easy tonight’s vote should be: it’s Jay. “Five to one…easy, easy, easy,” as Bret says. Ken is also not liking the fact Jay will be with a full belly after his Reward meal, which is even more reason to take him out tonight.

When the Zagat Survey returns, David, Hannah and Adam head off to discuss what they’re going to do, and the discussion centers around Bret. But while David and Hannah seem in favor of it, Adam confesses he’s more interested in gunning for his biggest rival, Jay. His rationale is that Bret is no threat to win any challenge, and Jay could easily win 2 in a row and win hands down at Final Tribal.

I’m a little lost at what to think right now, but that’s mostly because they’re showing a close-up of Hannah and the filth on her face is making me puke a little in my mouth. Will someone from Hair & Make-up please give her some concealer…!? Regardless, these three can’t come to a consensus, and it looks like it might come down to either Bret or Jay tonight.

At Vinaka, Jay and Bret are discussing what to do, but are interrupted by Ken and Hannah, who are suspiciously returning at the same time. Oh, PigPen, you di’n’t, girl? Did you? You nasty beeyotch, you did it with Ken by the poop field, didn’t cha?

Hannah asks Jay to come have a chat with her and David, which sets Bret off because they could be costing him – and themselves – a million dollars. He affirms why he’s the best thing this season when he confesses how it is dealing with “crazy people” and dopes.

“What could they possibly be discussing with him?” he cries…

Hannah tells Jay the lay of the land between her, David and Adam voting with Jay and it’s a solid,

David – yes
Hannah – maybe
Adam – no

Jay asks if she’d be on board if he could sway Adam and she tells him she would. So he’s got to go talk to Adam. He promises the former Screamer that if he’ll vote with him, he’ll guarantee to take Adam to final 3. Don’t know how much weight that holds at this point, but Jay is so confident with his Hidden Idol he’s rolling the dice.

Adam tells us he’s conflicted about what to do, because even though they’ve formed this odd combatant/brother relationship, and knowing that Jay promises to take him to final 3, the only question left on Adam’s mind is…

“Can I beat him?” We’ll see what unfolds as the players grab their torches and head to Tribal Council.

After everyone takes their seats and Jeff calls in the jury, we once again get to witness the Stink-Eye Gang file in. This has got to be a directive by the producers because everyone looks ridiculous with those fake “resting bitch face” stares… Even Bret gets a laugh at that. And you can tell Sunday is doing everything she can from not bursting out laughing…

Jeff calls the session to order and tells the room about David’s Immunity and the Reward that Jay stole. Tribal Council then goes as follows:

-Jay says he made his pitch to stay because he’s tired of being at the bottom
-Adam confirms that it was a working lunch
-Bret announces that it’s either him or Jay, and “that surfer kid” is a threat
-But the surfer kid counters that the jury are all Bret’s chums
-Bret retorts with “Jay has friends, too, on the jury.”
-Hannah lets us know she’s thinking about the jury, too (why?)
-Jeff tries to embarrass Jay by mentioning he didn’t cover his numbers at the challenge
-Ken informs us that your brain gets wonky on Day 36
-JP says the steak-eaters will definitely have an advantage tomorrow
-David is clearly delusional. Hannah could beat him in an arm wrestling competition
-Ken mentions that idols may be at play, but thinks if anyone had made one at night, he’s sure the others would have heard it (are you sure about that…?)
-Hannah says everyone has a vote and a purpose (thanks for that)

JP knows we got a lot of show left so he tells them to go vote, toot sweet. When they’re done, he collects the urn and asks for any Hidden Idols. With smug confidence, Jay tells Jeff to hold on one cotton pickin’ minute and pulls the Home Depot Idol out of a giant orange bucket. The shock on the others is apparent, all except David, who’s just waiting for the mic to drop…

“This is…not a Hidden Immunity Idol,” Jeff announces, causing Jay to snap his neck to Jeff and I believe he may have pooped his wetsuit a little…

Jeff throws the piece of junk into the fire and David dives in to save this work of art. Actually, the air that’s left the room has caused to fire to go out, and someone from Special Effects has to come out to relight the Weber Summit.

During that delay, Ken takes the opportunity to speak when the cameras aren’t on him –he’s shy, ya know – and also calls for Jeff’s attention.

“Jeff, can I give something to you?”

He rises, and in his best gunslinger vibe yanks up his pant leg to pull out the Legacy Advantage. He hands it over to Jeff and tells the others that it signifies he has Immunity tonight. Which is probably no big deal, considering he’s not on the chopping block, but it does cause Jessica to have a slight heart murmur, realizing she could have been safe tonight – had she been able to survive four additional votes after her rock draw. Maybe a slight over-reaction on her part, but I get it, everyone’s got to do what they can to increase the drama. Good on ya, Det. Washington!

“I hate this game…” she whispers to the jury… (Shhh, don’t say that, Jessica, Mark Burnett may be listening!).

Jeff reads the votes.


And the kid from Ft. Lauderdale rides his last wave of the season as he goes out gleefully, jokingly, and appreciative for the opportunity. What a class act. Oh, by the way, hey Michaela, you should pay attention to how Jay just walked out. THAT’s how you do it. No need to be bitter, pissed off, and ghetto, just grab your shoes and be happy you got to play. JFC, I hate that chick…


  1. Hey Fish, Great recap. I agreed with about 99% of what you said. I’ll get to the other 1%. Yes, Ken was screwed (oh my!) I think he truly deserved the win. Why do you think he got such HATE from the jury? I mean, they really acted like they hated Ken. Especially Chris and Bret. Jealous bc he’s better looking than them? Did Bret secretly wish he’d come out to Ken instead of the King Dork, buck toothed doofus Zack? I went this season from liking both Bret and Chris to hating both of them by the end. But back to Adam, yes, once again a sob story wins. What’s even more annoying is that the jury was sitting there patting themselves on the back for this great decision, thinking they had such great reasons, when all it was came down to I think simple jealousy. I think Ken’s looks actually hurt him in the end. BTW, he’s only 33. He’s a total hottie but jeez, I’m 46 and I look younger than him. I couldn’t believe he’s only 33. Anyway, the one think I differ with you on is Bret. Best moment of the season, getting a buzz and telling creepy Zack you like boys too. Does this really deserve congratulations and several precious moments of reunion time? I believe my 12 year old son Jack summed it up best as we watched when he said, “so if I’d said to someone that I like girls, that would have been the best moment of the season?!” Yep! But we can agree to disagree on that. As for Chris, yeah what a dick. He just had to say “since I’m a trial lawyer.” I’m an attorney myself and met my husband in law school. Chris was the kind of guy we hated in law school. And Jessica is an attorney too but yet that seems to have been forgotten. Again, why did Chris hate Ken so much? A few other things. Taylor looked fat. Michela had on the ugliest shade of lipstick and was way too pleased with herself. They will make mince meat out of her on the next season. Figs looked worse at the reunion than she did on the island and I think her mole was bigger. Jeff Probst looked like he’s had some major botox done and it was not a good luck. Did you notice that? And F the stupid transformation talk. How stupid! How did David transform himself? I bet he still hates bugs, still startles easily and still can’t swim. All he did was not die out there or quit. Who the F cares! As for the new season, I am so excited to see Tony back and Caleb. I agree about that stupid Ciera. Both my son and I yelled NOOOO when we saw her. Who likes her!? Glad to see Aubry, Malcom, Ozzy (who I find a bit annoying) and even Tai back. Sandra is also annoying but she is funny. Please let Ciera be voted out first. Good luck with all Fish. You are a great writer, and I hope to see you on Survivor some day!!!

  2. Fish first off thanks for making my Thursday (sometimes Friday ) afternoons a little more bearable by writing this column . Survivor should be decided on gameplay and gameplay only . Of course I have compassion for Adam . However he won a game he didn’t deserve to win . Yes he found some idols . Yes he won some immunities . Yes he made some good moves . He also made some horrible ones . He isn’t the worst player to ever win but he is closer to the bottom than the top . Ok this is where the hate mail starts . I am sure I am in the minority here but here goes . Hannah sold me on her play . Survivor isn’t only about brute strength its about manipulation . Hannah swayed people to vote who she wanted out . She convinced people her way was the best way . She did id all while hiding in the shadow of David and Ken . She let David take all the heat while she made the moves . Hell she almost had David play an idol for her and did get Adam too play one for her ! She singlehandedly talked Ken into flipping on David . Why she didn’t make that more obvious at the final shocked me . She not only made it to the end but got there with the 2 people she wanted to go against ( she had no way of knowing about Adam s mom ) . Yes she is annoying and dirty but she really played the only game she could play . She wasn’t going to win any challenges . She wasn’t a magnetic personality . She played her strengths . She played the innocent non threatening card all the way to final 3 ! Thanks to all fellow commentators for your perspective and humor ( Fred and Barney was best line of season ) . Merry Christmas and the best of New Years to all . Next season should be an all time classic . Come on February !

  3. Fish, thank you for the joy you bring in these recaps. I truly do look forward to them each week. I’m so sorry to hear about your troubles. I’m sending some positive vibes your way! 2016 was a really douchey year and I’m sincerely hoping 2017 gets better. But judging by how the electoral college let me down today (also no politics) and ZsaZsa Gabor is no longer with us, I’m losing hope fast. Ah well, on to Survivor!

    So, I almost had a heart attack the first time I read “Barfbie.” I somehow missed the “f” in there. I couldn’t figure out what had happened to you 🙂 Ughhhhh, Hannah. Hubs and I turned her into a drinking game (anytime she touched her hair or her glasses or we caught a glimpse of her teeth we had to drink). Needless to say, we ended up having to rewatch much of the episode the following day as we were a tad fuzzy on all the details.

    I think of the final 3, Adam was the correct winner. He made some stupid moves, but played hard the whole time. He was able to recover from his blunders. However, I think Ken deserves a little credit for his game. He won the immunity challenges when it mattered most and made the “big move” of voting David out. I cannot and will not defend Hannah. I’m sure she makes a mean latte, but she really irritated me on the show. I really can’t stand when the sob story wins the season. Sad? Yes. Made me want to root for him? Definitely. Deserving of a million dollars? Not necessarily. I’m with you all that winning should be based on your game, not your personal life. The hubs said if he ever plays he’s going to “Johnny FairPlay” everyone to tears at final tribal just to win.

    Overall, I was okay with this season. I did appreciate the respect the players had for each other and the lack of a true villain. I think Michaela could have played that role, but thankfully they got rid of her before she could fully embrace it. I’m not excited to see her again next season. I AM excited for Ozzy and Malcolm…both former place holders in my “Freebie Five” in their respective seasons. Again, poor hubs. It could be a long season for him 🙂

    Happy holidays to everyone! Stay safe and warm. See you all next year!

  4. Thank you for another great recap Fish, these are always entertaining but this one was especially funny. Your perspective on Michaela and Ken are interesting… I think you’re spot on with Hannah though. I understand why you feel the way you do about Michaela but I found her to be pure entertainment.

    I don’t think Ken deserved to win. Yes he was dominate in some challenges but that is it. No one was afraid to take him to a final because he wasn’t a threat. He skated through to the end because he wasn’t going to make any strategic moves or make any power plays. I still don’t consider the Dave vote a power play… It was a given for me. If he didn’t make that move I would consider him more of a goat than Hannah. At least Hannah tried and had an impact on the game. I could argue Ken made zero impact.

    Hope to see you writing recaps again next season!

  5. OK, deep breath, here goes. I’m glad I was wrong about Adam leaving, and I have to agree with Jen, he was the most deserving of the three. I actually thought he played a good game all along, going back to the Figgy vote. Bottom line is that he was always playing, sob story or not. Ken didn’t play until day 38. I’m wrong, he did play before that, but he played badly. Four challenge wins is impressive, but without game acumen he is just another Fabio, and who the hell wants to see that? I see both sides of the Hannah argument, but I have to go back to the fact that everyone wanted to take Ken and Hannah to the end, which tells me that they all knew these two were not playing good games, and they wouldn’t have voted for them. That speaks volumes to me. And I still stand on the Fish side of Hannah, in that she was a ditz and a skitz and was more reactionary than anything. I understand why people saved her butt the times that they did, for their own games, but jeez! I felt like it inflated her head and she came into FTC thinking she had a convincing argument to win the game, when to me she was just annoying. It was kind of funny, expected bitter jurors but got bitter finalists instead! When all is said and done, I would have love to see Jay win more than anyone. That fake idol was classic, but his reaction was even better, probably the best exit I can remember. Lol, “Go ahead Jeffrey, snuff my torch” ranks right up there with “Dude, it’s a f—ing stick”. He proved what a cool dude he was and shed his earlier wanker by association status from Figtails. All in all, this was a great season, I think one of the best. Not overly thrilled about a lot of the choices for next one, I mean Cirie, Sandra and Ozzy again, seriously?? Enough already with them. Although I can’t complain about the Malcolm eye candy again, meow.
    Fish, I hope all works out well for you, I really do. And happy holidays to everyone on here, you were all very cool and welcoming to me, and it’s such a pleasure to read intelligent comments on this awesome show. Til next time, everyone have a great one!

  6. Jay was on my hated list early but he ended up being one of my all time favorite players ! Fish imagine the beautiful babies him and Coconuts would make . I have a feeling Jay will be back , I appreciate not getting too much hate for my Hannah defense ( though Fish may still let me have it ) .

  7. Kate: Thanks, doll. Love ya! I’m starting to wonder if Ken was given a better edit than he deserved. For example, what if Ken was really a snobby model who condescended to everyone…but we never saw any of that! We did hear Will say a few negative things a couple episodes ago, but what if Ken really wasn’t very liked, and the jury vote showed it…? All I know is we see maybe 2% of everything that’s shot, so it stands to reason there’s a ton of footage that would help us understand why things went down like they did. And yup, we’re gonna disagree on Bret. I don’t care so much that he “came out” to Zeke, I just think it showed the difference between the two generations in a really deep/emotional/social kinda way. People forget about don’t ask/don’t tell but it was a crazy time back when we we’re young adults. I’m 49 so you and I know the same reality of that. Chris confirmed why lawyers are so slimy. And BTW, I recently worked for a long stint at a courthouse in downtown LA and whenever I went in to use the public restroom with jurors, the public, and many attorneys, the lawyers were the ones who most frequently didn’t wash their hands after peeing. Think about that next time you wanna sue someone… Re: Jessica, I’m always wondering how she took so much time off from her job. If she’s really an ADA, then how did she take off 6 weeks to shoot, how did she spend so much time on social media, and how did she take even more time off for the finale/reunion/las vegas trips? I know public sector employees accrue lots of vacation days, but isn’t that a lot? I dunno… More: everyone looks fat, Michaela needs styling tips for life, Figgy looked majestic, and I do agree with the Jeff botox comment. I know one reason he’s stayed youthful all these years…no kids! Re: S34, I have many thoughts on that. I may write a pre-recap of the season and post it sometime in February. RealitySteve said he’d approve. And thanks for always being such an avid reader of mine. I think of you — and my favorite bartender, Jack — when I write sometimes, wondering what you’ll think. Happy holidays, kinb! XO

    Rick: No, thank YOU for reading it and being my best commenter. I wish I could get these to you on Thursdays, but there are some realities of watching it back that causes me to wait. But thanks for always being there! I agree about the gameplay, but I realize these are humans who have their own motivations when choosing a winner. I just wish they were more cutthroat when deciding who played the best game. Now, that doesn’t mean I think Russell Hantz should have won, because he never got the social aspect of the game, but I’m with you that it shouldn’t be decided by who’s got the best sob story. Hell, I’d love for someone to pull some great story out of their ass at FT and say, “My wife lost our baby in utero and this money will help us bring a child into this world,” and then collect everyone’s votes and gladly accept the check from Jeff. And then SMASH CUT to the winner telling Jeff he made the whole thing up and he’s taking the money and gonna go hit Vegas and get a bunch of coke and whores. I mean, that would be such great TV! Who’s got the ‘nads to pull that one off? Coincidentally, I’ve always thought about making an application video and pull off a flamboyantly gay contestant applying after losing a partner, and then do the big “I”m not gay, I just played one on TV” reveal after the FT vote just to see if I could “keep it up” all season. Ah well, let someone else steal that idea, I gotta go to work… And what the what are you talking about RE: Hannah? Are you a Stooges fan or something? Got a soft spot for dirty girls? What gives? She wore that goat status like it was a technicolor dream coat. And did you see all the Zeke/Hannah photos from their Las Vegas trip? Sittin’ in the tub together, eating the same food, him grabbing her boob? I think they think they’re being cool and saucy but it just makes me think she’s a fag hag (that’s what us Gen-Xers used to call it). Me no likey. But you, Rick, are good with me. Thanks for all your comments and I wish you the bestest 2017…

    Jen: Really appreciate you continuing to write in. And I’m glad you’re digging my spaghetti… Hannah’s only purpose should be as a drinking game, she is a barista. Let’s hope she can parlay her 15 minutes of fame into a bartending gig at a gay nightclub somewhere in West Hollywood. I’m sure she has many fans there now. RE: the winner, I just don’t like accepting someone like Adam. The whole, “this is my life” comment on the reunion just made me hate that we had to see this play out on TV. Damn, I mean, have some class and keep your most private affairs quiet. It’s like capitalizing on your mom’s death to benefit financially. Isn’t anyone else seeing the shittiness in that? And hell, if the FT jury is always going to go with sob stories, than maybe they should cast people who don’t have such blatant sob stories. I’ve been saying it for years, the casting of reality TV is the most important and time after time, Survivor’s casting department gives us people they think we’re gonna like, but they just give us idiots… I do support your comment about no true villains this season. I wonder if someone was supposed to play that role but left early? Mari? Paul? you know how I feel about Michaela. And I’m super excited about S34. BTW, if you’re Freebie Five justifies checking out what Ozzy’s packing, feel free to navigate to: Consider that your Christmas present… XO

    MVD: Thank you for writing in and I’m happy you liked it. To be honest, when I start writing I have no idea where I’m going sometimes and stuff just spews out. I’m glad you’re liking my spew… Ok, that sounds weird… You know, I don’t know why I hated Michaela so much because I didn’t start the season that way. Yes, I felt she was totally unaware of how the game worked and not very savvy on television, but I didn’t hate her. I just hate when someone like her gets rewarded with so much Production support like she was some mastermind. As she said herself, she was just doing the sea shell thing so she could keep it straight in her head. Most of us could actually — do the math — in our head. And they make her out to be some super player. AND bring her back!? WTF did she do to “change the game” other than show her titties? Nothing… I see what you’re saying about Ken but I just think he picked it up at the end when it’s the most critical. I think he played it low key the whole game, because he is low key. He wore the crown of wallflower and they crucified him for it. As a former wallflower myself, I really appreciated his vocalizing how out of sorts he was, but he still played the game. Hannah, David, Zeke and Adam just struck me as characters they were told to play… Happy holidays and I hope to see you back next season!

    Jersey: Love your input. I see everything you say and I don’t disagree with any of it. I know I’m going all in on Ken (that sounds uncomfortable) but I just like stronger players winning. Yeah, maybe we didn’t see much gameplay out of him, but I always thought you can win without having to scramble infinitely. True, I didn’t think he was gonna win any intelligence contests, but he smoked the others in that word unscrambling, so he proved something there. I just think he’s not a flashy player and people wanna see a flashy player win. I’m not one of those people. I just never wanna see goats at FT… Thanks for all your kind words and I look forward to hearing from you next season. Happy New Year!

    Rick2: I do love me some Jay and I agree we’ll probably see him again. I was just thinking about how many players there have been and what it takes to stand out enough to be invited back. You really gotta make your mark and hope America likes you. That’s why I hate the Michaela call back. And yeah, there’s also the fact that some people CAN’T take that much time off from work/family/life, so anyone who does probably is looking to make any change thrown at them. I think Jay would be great on another season, but hopefully not with a dumb theme. As I tweeted today, I think they may be saving some players for an epic “Legends” season (Coach, Russell, and many others) and I hope they’ve hired a new casting director by then… And it’s not worth hating on you for liking Hannah, I’m sure you’ve had countless fantasies of bathing with her… 😉

    Peace out, troops! Go spend some money on your families! And Long Live President Trump…!

    (sarcasm, much?)

  8. Why I actually love the 3 Stooges ! When I think GOAT I think Woo . I think Gervase Blood VS Water . Hannah actually made decisions ( not washing being the most obvious ) . I understand people thinking they can beat her but twice people played or almost played idols for her ! Partially because they thought they could beat her but partially because she gained their trust .

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