This past episode was a tad bit blah for me. I don’t know if everyone else felt that way, but even with all the maneuvering around, and blindside talk, it still felt a little sluggish. But, that is to be expected at this point in this season especially, where every week it just seems to be the same focus on Abi being a b*tch and Lisa not knowing what she wants to do. Ok, we get it, Abi’s stupid and annoying to be around and Lisa is crazy and can’t remember that she’s playing Survivor and it’s ok to vote someone out. Let’s just get on with the season already. Let’s talk about something new already. I think this has just felt like a seriously extended season of Survivor. Does anyone else feel that way, as well? I feel as if every other season of Survivor has been done and voted on at this point. I don’t keep track of how many episodes this has been, but this has to have been the 307th episode so far, this season, I swear!
Anyway, I’ll try and get over the sluggishness of this episode to still bring to you your weekly entertainment via my blog. I’m sure Mark Twain and Ernest Hemingway would be proud of me. You know, because they were great writers who probably also had to write under similar scenarios during their distinguished careers.
The episode begins with Abi, for the first time in her life, deciphering something through observation alone. Oh wait, now I remember that everyone on Earth already knew that Mike, Lisa, Malcolm, and Denise are in a four person alliance. The four of them practically walk around camp with team jerseys on, with cute little nicknames on the back, like Pooper Skuper, Facts of Survivor, Fabio, and Doc. So, before I give Abi props for figuring out that there is a four person alliance in the game, I’ll have to remind myself of that. Nice try, Abi! You can’t pull one over on us that easily.
And, the second person to come to an easy realization within the first three minutes was Lisa…who came to realize that, perhaps, Penner was right, and that Malcolm is playing a great game and that if she does go to the end with him and Denise, it probably wouldn’t end well in her favor. And, this is why I think I like my previous idea where Probst holds the Tribal council, and then after all the questions have been answered, he dismisses everyone for 20 minutes or so, allowing them to talk over their options again. Or, hell, do it once every season as a surprise twist, just to get the juices flowing a little and making things a little more excited for the viewer, because as of right now, the person who the alliances agrees on to go home before Tribal will always go home because they never openly talk to each other during the council time to discuss changing their votes. Or, maybe they do and CBS just edits that part out. Wouldn’t that be cool to see? Just throwing it out to the entire tribe, and the jury, about who is going to vote what, and openly discussing changing it because new information has been brought to the forefront. I feel as if this option should have been thought up by the Producers by now, 48 seasons into the show! If it hasn’t, that just means they don’t even care and just accept the first 20 applications they receive, pay some people off the streets to hold cameras for a few hours a day, and give Jeff Probst something like $15 Million to stand out there and put people on blast during competitions! Let’s start to care more about your product. And, by care, I don’t mean Redemption Island.
I don’t mean to be rude, but these folks have some weird family members. Carter’s mom appeared to be a small person (that’s the pc term, right?), Denise’s husband looked as if he JUST learned to run the few moments before Probst called his name, and Lisa’s brother apparently JUST learned to how to phonetically pronounce the word “sister” the few moments before Probst called his name. Speaking of learning – someone needs to teach Lisa how to cry. The only worse cryer in the world is that Farrah chick from Teen Mom. Has anybody seen that chick cry before? Good Lord. Her face goes from pretty to handicapped before the tears even start to flow. Geez. Again, I’m not trying to be rude, but you know I’m right! It doesn’t make you an @sshole to laugh. I’m taking that on for you. You’re welcome.
And, what kind of a reward is taking them back to camp?!? They don’t even get a meal? Or a boat ride? The people of the Philippines must not be offering up too much to the show, so they had to cut back on the rewards given out. I guess the overnight part is cool, but if I’m the family member not in the game, I kind of don’t want that. I’d prefer the massage, the cuisine, and the shower compared to a night with smelly folks, and sleeping on a bamboo pole. They got the shaft on this one, that’s for sure.
I think its not just Jeff that dislikes Abi – I think the production/editing team dislikes her too – I noticed that they show bad shots of her – tripping over stuff on the beach, rather than the booty strutting down the waters edge or something…makes me laugh. I wonder if she tries to engage the camera guys into debate or something, or says mean things to them too – b/c they like to show crappy shots of her. haha.
I was really hoping that when Malcolm won immunity they wouldn’t switch the vote to Denise. That probably would have been the ‘smart’ way to play the game, but I’m glad they didn’t.
If someone brings that stupid Abi to the end just so they can beat her, I may scream. She is annoying as h@ll and such a B! And because she is sooo dense, she will think she actually made it to the end on her excellent game play – *eye roll*!
In real life, I would be just as wishy-washy as Lisa and worried about hurting people’s feelings . . . . which is one of the many reasons that I can talk about this show, but could never actually BE on Survivor.
Love your recaps – your sarcasm cracks me up!
Hilarious recap, Scott – more entertaining than the show itself.