Angkor tribe (Night 9). The tribe returns after tribal and Varner is stoked he didn’t get one vote. He’s totally ready to “kiss some asses” and I don’t think that’s much of a stretch for Mr. Varner (oh behave!). He’s a tad concerned he’s going to have to be indebted to these fools, but after the move he played at the last challenge, that’s the bed he’s made for himself, and he knows he has to lie in it.
Tash pulls Woo aside and lets him know that she didn’t agree with Peih-Gee going home, because it should have been Varner who got snuffed. She tells him Varner should be the next to go, because he’s a snake and the source of all the drama in the tribe. She assures Woo that he’s “not going anywhere.”
Unbeknownst to Tash, Abi is listening in on this conversation and immediately takes the opportunity to jump on Tash for trying to keep Woo around, WHEN HE JUST VOTED FOR ABI!. And as sure as the sun rises in the east, Abi’s ire will arise when something happens she doesn’t agree with. At this moment, it’s Tash speaking to Woo in private, so she’s going to let “Crazy Abi” come to the surface again.
There’s actually only two Abis: Crazy Abi and Totally Insane Abi. This one is just Crazy Abi.
Tash suggests they go speak in private, but Abi ain’t playing that. She wants everyone to hear how crazy she is. And they do. And she’s an idiot. And I’m predicting bad things for Abi this season.
Over at Bayon (Day 10) Jeremy finally gets to celebrate the Idol he found but has to pretend he’s still looking for it to keep Stephen close. Jeremy wants to be the new incarnation of J.T., and is fine having Stephen be the runner-up again. Jeremy is all-or-nothing this season. I like that…
At Angkor, the Curse of Ravu haunts the tribe. They are destitute. They are hungry. They are withering away. But good news is on the horizon! Varner and Woo return with Treemail announcing a Reward Challenge and the winners will feast. That’s just what this tribe needs and they march toward the challenge – in a straight line – with high hopes.
Jeff Probst calls everyone in and the other 2 tribes get a look at the new Angkor (with Peih-Gee voted out). No one seems surprised. At all. I mean…
At. All.
Well, I guess she really DIDN’T have a chance to win, Jeff. Not even one, “Whoa…” from anyone.
Turns out the challenge is a Hero Challenge (is that a thing, now?) where only one person from each tribe will compete. This one involves retrieving 3 sandbags from decks on the water and then launching them onto a platform using a catapult. Competing will be:
Savage for F**ked
Jeremy for Feelings
Dietz for First-Rounders (why not Joey…?)
A physical challenge like this requires the men to conserve some energy, so it’s almost a slow-motion challenge. All three guys get their first bags and return to the beach about the same time with Dietz launching – and connecting! – first. Jeremy’s first attempt falls inches short, Savage is way off. Jeremy then rights the ship and lands his 2nd attempt, Savage is still off. With Dietz having built a sizable lead, Savage finally lands his 3rd attempt and will have some catching up to do.
Terry returns to the beach with his 2nd bag first but has some difficulty remembering what he just did 2 minutes ago. He repositions the plank and launches 2 horrible attempts. This opens the door for Jeremy, who again comes up inches short on his attempt. Savage finally gets back to the beach as well, and a miracle occurs when Savage nails his first attempt on bag #2. He’s taken the lead!
Dietz finally connects and heads out to catch up to Savage. Soon, Jeremy connects on bag #2 and it looks like he’s got a lot of ground to make up as the other 2 guys are already grabbing bag #3 from their deck in the water. With a mixture of fatigue, motivation, and desire, the guys all challenge themselves to their fullest. Dietz overtakes Savage on the run back to the launching board and gets his shot off first. Just a little long.
With poise, confidence, and utter exhaustion, Savage launches.
And nails it!
The F**ked tribe will be heretofore known as the Feasting tribe…!
In the race for 2nd place, Jeremy hustles back and is able to launch a shot before Terry can launch another shot (to be honest, it looks like Terry may have launched about 5 shots before Jeremy got off one, but we’ll forgive the editors for not showing us all the failed attempts). Jeremy’s shot goes long, opening the door for one more attempt by Dietz.
And he hits it!
Ta Keo gets the “mini-BBQ” kit from Walmart, and Bayon is the S**t Out Of Luck tribe…
“Everybody, grab your s**t and get outta here,” Jeff tells ‘em.
I’m really hoping to see the end of Abi soon. She’s incredibly annoying and the only way she makes it to the end is as the sacrificial “LOL do you guys hate me enough to actually give HER the million dollars?” player… Not my favorite type.
As far as TWD, I can’t imagine Father Gabriel would try to sabotage Rick’s plans, and even if he did, (as confusing as that mess of an episode was) he thought the plan that day was to just do a dry run and take out any obstacles/problems with the actual plan going off the day after. I’m guessing from the Talking Dead sneak peak, it looks like Enid or Erid or whatever Coral’s girlfriend’s name is offed herself and landed on the horn in that car she got into. No clue what “SSJ” or “JSS” is on the windshield.
I rewatched the show afterwards, fast forwarding through the color scenes to watch all the black and white scenes, then restarted and watched all the color scenes, skipping the black and white. Makes infinitely more sense and would have been a far better episode that way in my opinion. Having a weird time jump that’s not even 24 hours seems like a waste. Could have just been a fluent episode but whatever, still a better episode than most of the stuff last season which is a huge plus in my book and INFINITELY better than Fear The Walking Dead.
Hi Fish! I missed last week’s recap so I got double the laughs today, e.g., Spencer’s talk with Jeremy about robot love and having to go recharge – hilarious. Your recaps are always entertaining but I’m thinking the alcohol makes them even more so. For last night’s episode, why on earth did they send the three oldest guys out to do the most physical challenge? Don’t get me wrong, I’m not young and I very much appreciate the eye candy that Dietz, Savage and Jeremy are, but I would have thought the younger guys would have been the prime candidates for such a grueling event. Especially when Savage looked like he was really hurting afterwards. Also, you were so right when NO ONE was surprised about Pei Gee getting voted out – not even a blink of an eye! Glad Varner is gone – he was definitely a pot stirrer and could not be trusted … although he did have some charm about him that could be persuasive in a weak moment. Great job on the recaps, love your writing … and YOU!
Hi Fish,
I just keep finding Survivor really boring. I hope it gets more exciting, and I’m usually the one who loves the all star type seasons. Again-NOT ENOUGH KEITH (I know how much you hate that!) What has happened to Woo? He had so much personality on his first season? Now he just sits there with his mouth open all the time, looking stunned, and he isn’t even very physical. Maybe he needs a man bun? My son Jack’s new name for Dietz is “meats” since Jack said “he’s fat.” And you would be proud bc when they showed Monica and Spencer talking jack said “look at her butt” and did that 11 year old boy giggle. You two would be buddies! Best line of the night was Varner saying “you little bitch” to Abby after he got voted off. Yep. I can’t stand the way Abbi thinks she’s in control right now. Its so annoying and how when Woo tells the tribe thank you for keeping him, she smugly says “you’re welcome.” Oh, it almost makes me want to scream. She is just a nasty person. Despite how much Vaner enjoyed eating Savage’s sausage-yes, I said that-it didn’t help the poor tribe win where it counts. so much for calories! I don’t watch Gotham but I did see that Brody’s wife has moved on to getting herself knocked up by her costars. To me, she will always be Brody’s wife. Can you explain Kimmie to me? Who is she? I must have missed that season but why would she be a fan favorite? What happened to the medical evac?
I for one will be happier to finally see a tribe other than the “slumming it” tribe go to Tribal Council. Just so we can see more interaction between those groups…and more of Joe’s fabulous man bun. I was VERY surprised his tribe did not choose him for the challenge. He didn’t put himself forward either …which means he may realize being a *Superstah* isn’t the wisest move this time.
I cannot believe someone hasn’t shivved Abbi yet.
Enjoying the recaps!
-Hathor
Abi’s the worst because she thinks she’s going to change or is changing and is just the same. Be better if she’d just own her crap.
Yes, Monica can talk and we got to see a bit of T and A. Last week’s butt shots were so sweet. Like everyone else can we please focus on something other than Abi. The other tribes get so little air time.
Just how far is the loser’s camp from where the challenge was? They did get back until it was pitch black. Plus why are they still being staved to death, yes they won some sausage, but that is all they have had to eat. Survivor should not be randomly stacking the deck against a certain tribe.
Sort of bored so far, but that is due to the focus only being on the losers.
Thanks for the comments, folks! I love your involvement…
thatguy- Yes! And I hate the farther those kinds of players go (like s**thead last season) the more the other players suddenly realize they have to be taken to
FT so it increases their own chances of winning. Like I’ve said before, it sucks that they get paid for playing like assholes and have no chance to win, but
that’s why the other players should stand up and make a statement. “No more assholes at FT!” Plus, the fact she’s such a delusional bitch makes it unbearable to
watch every week. My whole problem with all the coverage she’s getting, is that it may mean she makes it DEEP in the game, since they essentially know who’s
going to FT when they start editing the episodes (that may not be the case this season, considering how little turnaround they had between shooting/airing, but
there’s always time to make episodes better. I think footage of other players: Monica, Kimmi, Keith, Kelley, Kelly, would be nice, since it’s almost like
they’re not playing at all…
I don’t watch Talking Dead, so I don’t know Enid or JSS or any of that. I guess we’ll find out in 2 days! Let’s hope we’ll get back to “normal” TWD episodes,
now that the premiere is done…
jlberry- Missed you, baby! Yes, the alcohol does allow me to “open up” a bit, however, it seems to affect my proofreading (Deitz, not Dietz). However, I’m glad
you’re back and having a good read… I guess Joe felt he didn’t wanna put himself out there too much, but I also read somewhere in a Varner exit interview
that the tribes thought there may be another part to the challenge, so they wanted to save Joe. Who knows what to believe? I guess the other players didn’t
think Peih-Gee deserved to be there, but again, who knows what she was like over there. I thought Varner was gold for as long as he was there. After his
initial, “I’m in over my head,” in episode 1, he really became the comic relief. And if you don’t follow me on Twitter, try to find the article I referenced on
there where Jeff totally rips Savage, and especially Tash, for a variety of things. Calls her a bitch, outright, and why he’s not surprised she’s a “40 year
old, single, childless” woman.” Scathing stuff… Read that…
Love ya, jlb…! XO
kinb- I know what you’re saying, chica. I’m not “bored,” per se, but these aren’t the exciting episodes we were expecting. Everything’s really “individual”
still, if you know what I mean, even though there are alliances. We’ll see what the rest of the season holds. I wish I could watch Survivor with you guys. With
anybody, for that matter… It’s something I’ve never done but I think it would be a lot of fun. And Jack can be the bartender! Abi = Satan. Not sure who
“Brody” is, but I think you’re talking about Morena Baccarin (she is so fine!). Kimmi was a loud-mouth (sort of) back when the Survivor mold was still being
formed. She’s famous for standing up to Alicia, who was just an Olympic goddess fitness-wise. I think a lot of America identified with the “girl next door,”
Kimmi, standing up to the feisty warrior. TBH, she wasn’t THAT memorable back then, and it was a surprise to me she was voted on to Second Chance. (I was just joking about Medical Evac!)
hathor- As I mentioned earlier, I wanna see some other people, too! Enough with Abi/Varner/PG/Woo. Gimme some Monica, gimme some Joe, gimme some Wentworth. Maybe they’re holding some people back for later on, or…maybe these folks are just kinda boring… I think Joe said in his Intro video that he doesn’t wanna be the Hero as much, since that made him a target last season. Hell, he saved his energy and look what it got him. I’m tempted to shiv her, myself… Thanks for the support and kind words. Miss you!
EJ- Hope you liked the shout out! Damn those Bums! Nice play on that shift, huh? And couldn’t Ethier just NOT catch that foul? That run was the difference… And yeah, Abi is the anti-christ. I just wish she’d go away…
doc- I know you appreciated Monicabutt! Can’t wait for the “rest of the season” to happen, there’s still so much to occur. I would love to know how the show justifies one tribe being treated so unfairly. It can’t just be, “that’s the roll of the dice.” It’s really unfair. And yeah, like I said to kinb earlier, the season is a little boring because these players are trying to win rather than trying to “make a name” in reality TV. Most have been in the relative spotlight for a while now, so the urgency isn’t to make big dumb statements (like Dickhead Dan last season). Funny how some of these people just fade away… And I just wonder how this season’s excellerated editorial schedule affected the quality of the episodes. Kinda like, typically they have 7 weeks to make a show and this time they only had 4 (or something like that). Not sure that’s altogether accurate, but it just makes me wonder.
Thanks to everyone for your comments and support. I really hope you all are enjoying the reads, and I’ll continue to try and find the humor in the absurb. All my fishy kisses to you…
Fish