SURVIVOR: WC vs BC vs NC – 4/15/15

Over at the Chocolate Bar, the winning 5 are welcomed with a disgusting amount of candy, popcorn, and drinks. There’s really no other way to say it. Okay, yeah, I get it, you’re undernourished, and in need of a refill, but how many chocolate bars do you need to satisfy that? I would guess that maybe after 3 big Snickers bars that would be a sickening amount of candy. And yeah, I like Snickers, but how many can you eat before you feel sick to your stomach? And with their bodies in the state they’re in, I’m sure all this sugar and chocolate is going to cause havoc in their intestines.

Mike has evidently been craving Snickers since Day 1 and I swear to God I think he’s going to cry again. What a f**king baby… Sierra is simply over the moon, Dan and Tyler are enjoying their spoils, and Shirin confesses she’s the most excited considering where she stood last night at Tribal.

Back at camp Loserville, even though they didn’t win the challenge, they’re not too bent because they’re going to be eating chicken today. With only 2 birds left, they decide (everyone except Jenn, that is) they deserve to eat well so they’re going to kill one of the chickens. Jenn, on the other hand, doesn’t eat meat, and considers the chickens “hers” so she’s really bent about losing another friend. First Hali, now a chicken. (Hope that makes you value your friendship, Hali…)

Rodney’s the most vocal about “she’ll get over it,” but the only thing I’m wondering is why does Jenn have such a poochie belly? Oh well, my mind wanders…

Finally, Jenn laments, “None of this is fun. I’ve got nothing out here, except despair…”

So if levity is what she needs, than levity you shall receive! Rodney commences the National Lampoon Radio Hour with slick impersonations of Mike and Dan. He brings the others to stitches and helps everyone forget about the challenge. Joe, paying close attention to the things Rodney is saying about Mike, realizes he may have found an “in” to stick around a bit longer, but he’ll have to wait and see if he can make some magic happen in the next immunity challenge. And in what could be the most telling comment this episode, Rodney alludes to the next tribal and foretells that,

“Ain’t nobody safe out here…”

With the tribe reunited the next day (Day 24), Treemail arrives and Dan (and his underboob beard) reads the clue. It alludes to the Immunity Challenge involving “staying on your toes” so that’s going to mean some kind of endurance challenge. Ok, I’m cheating because I saw a teaser video of this challenge today, but I wanted to seem smart for a second…

Joe acknowledges he’s got to win this challenge or else he may be going home. Not really sure why he thinks he’s “all alone” out here, since I thought he was in an alliance with Jenn, but maybe he’s lost all hope for her after the reward challenge.

Jenn tells us that Joe, Shirin and her are all at the bottom, and she’s just about ready to pack it in. She tells Joe that if it’s just the two of them left standing, he should stand down and let her win, and then she’ll give him the necklace at Tribal. On one hand, that would totally screw up the plans of those wanting to vote Joe out, and on the other, it would be hilarious, which seems a motivating factor in how Jenn plays the game.

Joe agrees to go along with it, but he seems a bit leery of simply giving up, and why would he care if it’s hilarious (to Jenn) to mess up the others’ plans? Just stick it out, win immunity for yourself, and let them vote out Jenn. But, she says she loves him, he reciprocates, and we’ll have to see what happens. Is Jenn playing a master fake? Or is she being legit? My senses are telling me she’s not faking, but let’s see how the challenge goes down…

And as we head over to the immunity challenge, my DVR is telling me we’re only halfway through tonight’s episode, and I can’t see this challenge taking up too much time. Even with upcoming post challenge scrambling, it looks like we’re in for a landmark Tribal Council. I’m just postulating, but these are the things that occur to me while watching Survivor. (So, yes, I’m still a fan susieduck!).

The challenge involves players standing on a beam, on their tiptoes. On top of the players’ head is a block of wood that must be kept wedged between their head and the top of the frame. A nice physical challenge that involves coordination, I like it… Let’s get this puppy underway…

Joe struggles at the beginning, but is able to right himself and regain his balance. Quickly, Carolyn and then Will drop their posts. After another tense moment, Joe manages to stay alive but with his post slightly off center. The next to go is Rodney, and then Dan’s falls. And once again, Dan proves what a jerk he is by stepping forcefully off his perch, which may have disrupted the other players. Jenn lets him know what a d**k he is.

Joe is struggling again to reposition his post. Not really a lot you can do when the block is not centered, but he’s trying to work some magic. While he’s doing that, Sierra loses focus and drops out, and we’re down to four: Joe, Jenn, Mike and Tyler. And finally, in what appears to be a huge pleasure for some of the other players, Joe drops his block and wipes the sweat from his eyes.

Soon after, Mike finally wavers and drops out. We’re down to just Jenn and Tyler, both looking strong. After 30 minutes, with hardly any movement to either of their blocks, we see some struggling. Jenn’s head is beginning to shake, and Tyler has to contend with a pesky gnat buzzing around his nose. Just when you think the gnat is going to cause Tyler’s downfall, Jenn falters and drops her block. Tyler wins immunity! And just before we head to the break, Jenn confesses she’s pissed she worked so hard in that challenge only to come up short. And while this means it probably spells the end for Joe, she’s going to try and shake things up to keep him in the game a little longer. I wonder what she’s going to do: Quit? Fake having an idol? Reveal Rodney’s impersonation routine?

Back at camp, everyone seems a bit worn out, so all that’s left to do is talk about voting plans. Joe knows he’s going to get votes, but he also makes a claim (to Shirin) that he’s got the hidden idol and he’s going to play it. Shirin, the numbers girl that she is, surmises that if the other 7 think Joe has an idol, they may split their votes, 4 for Joe and 3 for Jenn. So if Joe votes for Jenn also, then there could be a tie (assuming Jenn’s vote would go toward one of the Blues) or better yet, if Shirin could just vote for Jenn, then she’d go home 5-4-1 and Joe could stay in the game. I’m never a fan of someone essentially quitting the game, but if it’ll save Joe, I’m all for it (no homo, I swear…).

And when we finally hear what the “Maleficent 7” is planning – to split the vote 4-3 as Joe/Jenn/Shirin were just mentioning, it seems like everything could be working out for Joe staying alive. However, when Mike confesses he doesn’t want something getting in the way of seeing this plan through, so what he needs is for Shirin to prove her loyalty to Mike and vote for Joe, which is not what she intended to do. We’ll see…

Mike pulls her aside and gives her the instructions: “vote Joe” if you know what’s good for you. She’s conflicted because she doesn’t want to vote out a “friend” (Jenn), but she also knows how big a threat Joe is. She still thinks she has endgame potential, and she likes the fact she’s finally going to have an impact on this game. I think she’s getting a little power hungry.

With Joe planning to dummy up a fake idol outside of camp, and Mike plotting to “shadow Joe” no matter where he goes, this could get interesting. Joe will definitely need some time away from the others, so we may end up having another “mad dash.” Joe requests a private conversation with Dan, who complies.

Something that just occurred to me is Dan’s reaction to Joe’s request for a chat. Most people would just say, “yeah,” and go off with Joe. Dan almost appears to be trying to look ultra cool, almost like, “yeah, beautiful people ask me for my advice every day.” It’s just another thing about Dan I don’t like. It’s like “trying to act cool” when he’s obviously not. Man, I hate the casting people for bringing him on the show…

They head away from camp, and Joe makes his plea to stay in the game. Dan gives him the old, “I can’t sway those votes, baby.” So Joe thanks him, watches him trod back to camp, and then takes off like a rabbit! He scurries farther away from camp, lickety-split, and finds a small clearing where he can fashion a fake idol with pieces he’s been collecting. As a jewelry designer, he seriously knows what he’s doing, but something tells me he’s more of a “dreamcatcher” designer than a Princess Cut Solitaire designer. Oh well, it looks good enough to get the job done.

As Dan stumbles back to camp, Mike asks him “Where’s Joe?” and Dan just tells him, “He’s gone.” And the look of frustration on Mike is priceless. It’s like, “I turn my back for one second, and you screw this up…” He tells Dan they need to find Joe fast, so he sends him off. Mike heads over to his “secret spot,” which I hope is not where he goes #2. He quickly finds Joe and the two “leaders” discuss what’s up.

Joe tells him he knows they’ll probably split the vote, so he offers Mike his fake idol – after the vote – if Mike sends Jenn home. Mike pretends to not be keen on the idea, and he wants Joe’s idol BEFORE the vote. Joe says no and tells him he’d give it to him the next day. And even though Mike found the idol that Joe had a clue to, he unsure if Joe ever found an idol at the original No Collars camp. But doesn’t he realize that would have been the idol Jenn played 2 weeks ago? I’m confused, unless there’s still the idol that was hidden originally in the Blue Collar camp (where Merica is now). I don’t know, these dunderheads make my head hurt… Regardless, Mike admits that if Joe were to give him his idol, he MAY switch up his vote to allow Jenn to go home. Let’s go to Tribal, please…