SURVIVOR: WC vs BC vs NC – 3/18/15

March 19th, 2015 | 6 Comments | Posted in Survivor 30 - WC vs BC vs NC

Wednesday night and we’re blessed with another 2-hour block of Survivor. As a fan, I love these nights. We get 2 Tribal Councils, 2 eliminations, 2 more pieces of the puzzle solved. And I hear tonight is the tribe swap, so we’ve reached the next phase of the game.

As you know, this is when the game really begins. Because if you thought things were bleak before (I’m talking to you, No Collars!) this is when the tide can suddenly shift in your favor, and reaching Final Tribal may suddenly become a possibility. We saw it on BBB when the Brains went from bottom of the barrel to the top of the heap in a moment, with both Spencer and Tash benefitting from the swap. No, it didn’t get them to the final, but it did put them in a position where the final became a possibility. I wonder who’s going to benefit tonight, since there’s a lot of people sitting comfortably right now.

Here’s how I see players’ standings in the game:

Sitting Comfortably:
Carolyn – WC
Hali – NC
Jenn – NC
Joe – NC
Kelly – BC
Lindsey – BC
Sierra – BC
Tyler – WC
Boston Rod – BC

Tenuous:
Dan – BC
Joaquin – WC
Max – WC
Mike – BC
Shirin – WC
Will – NC

Kinda strange that most of the Tenuous ones are on tribes that are “winning,” but let’s re-evaluate after the tribe swap and see how things have evolved.

I’d love to spend a lot of time on other business right now, but with a 2-hour show I don’t wanna make this a longer column than it needs to be. And, selfishly, I’m also thinking about how little sleep I’m getting tonight, so let’s crack open this coconut and dive right in…

The recap doesn’t offer anything significant except a little reminder about Will receiving 2 votes last week. We knew that could come back to burn, Hali, didn’t we? We’ll see if it’s something that plays out tonight or if it’s just another show misdirection, but something tells me Will ain’t forgetting that someone other than Nina voted for him last night…

As the No Collars return to camp (Night 8) that’s pretty much the first thing Hali mentions to Will. She plays it like it was a “in case Nina had an idol” move, but that seems like a poorly thought out excuse. Regardless, Will accepts it (half-heartedly) and confesses the tribe is at its “make or break” point, so unless he can convince Joe to turn on one of the girls, Will will be gone next.

Day 9, and I imagine the Tribes’ morning routines go something like this: the White Collars are probably missing their venti caramel macchiatos from Starbucks, while the Blue Collars are thinking about a Styrofoam cup of black coffee from Yum Yum Donuts, and I guess the No Collars are picturing ripping a fat bongload for their daily “wake & bake” routine…

As Dan steps through camp to go somewhere (morning constitution, prolly…) he almost steps on a 3’ snake. Instantly, he calls Mike over who’s like the Child Catcher in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. He loves getting’ them critters” and grabs the machete. He makes quick work of the snake (f**k you, PETA!) and begins salivating over the snake tartare he’s about to be dining on. He enlists Kelly’s help to skin it, who’s never done this before, and they cook it on a stick. Personally, I’ve never eaten snake, and I don’t think I’ll ever NEED to, but it’s protein, and that’s what Rodney is craving. He gives it try, and admits any beef he had with Mike is in the past.

“That’s just men being men. One fight and get over it.”

Which may signify something’s blossoming between these two. Just as long as Dan as his hairy back fat isn’t involved, I’m okay with it…

And he we go, 4 minutes in and we’re already doing a challenge! That’s what I wanna see! Jeff welcomes the White and Blue tribes in and they take a gander at the new No Collars. I don’t think anyone was too surprised to see Nina gone, it was probably a foregone conclusion to everyone on the other tribes.

As the No Collars hit the mat, I’m seeing the same thing I noticed last week. Don’t ask me why I pick up on this, but it seems like Jenn has the dirtiest cooch on the beach. Okay, maybe it’s just her bikini, or a shadow, or maybe it’s just a heavier flow week, but you’d think you’d wanna – I don’t know – attend to that kinda thing before coming to a challenge. I mean, couldn’t she take a moment and jump into the ocean and do some laundry? Or couldn’t someone on her tribe, give her a heads up? How ‘bout someone on the crew? I don’t know, from what I read online yesterday, the crew actually does help out more than we’re told (supposedly Erinn from Tocantins was a guest speaker in Max’s Survivor class and admitted the crew gave her a lighter when she was on Exile Island one night) so I don’t think it’s out of anyone’s purview to toss Jenn some OxiClean so she can tend to her britches…?!

But I digress…

The challenge is the one we saw in last week’s tease where players are blindfolded and have to collect items and hoist them to a “caller” who’s up in a tower. Once again, this is the challenge where X’XXX proved her incompetence and validated she can never be called a “Brain” ever again. Today, however, we know someone’s getting bloodied, so I can only wonder who’ll be setting the Incompetence Bar very low. With Tyler sitting out on WC and Rodney and Mike sitting out for the BC, let the challenge begin.

With Carolyn, Sierra and Joe functioning as callers, we’re under way with the following blindfolded pairs:

Shirin & Max
Hali & Jenn
Lindsey & Kelly

This leaves Joaquin Dead, Cliffy Marblebags, and Manboobs as blindfolded “hoisters.”

Everyone zeroes in on different items at the start and despite every group violently crashing into posts and obstacles spread around the course, No Collar retrieves their first item and hoists it successfully to Joe. OMG, they’re actually leading a challenge! And as they go out to collect their second item, they surprisingly bring that one back before White and Blue even have one. I’m seeing a bit of foreshadowing as Jeff (or “JP” as Tyler calls him now) cautions Will about the platform hitting him when they drop it unevenly (methinks I smell blood on the horizon…).

As Hali and Jenn go out and grab their 3rd item, Shirin takes another smack on the cooter and I’m wondering how many more it will take to make her squirt (sorry, I went there, but she seemed so pleased when she took that last one…).

With all tribes encountering different obstacles in their sorties, the only consistent thing is the designated “hoisters” are all narrowly escaping disaster when their platforms come crashing to the ground. First Will, then Dan, then Joaquin all barely avoid a platform to the noggin. Jeff is remarkably yelling at them, saying they need to be policing themselves with this, but I’m sure OSHA has a few opinions about blindfolded contestants regulating their own safety and well-being… Oh well, they signed contracts!

When BC comes back with their next item and successfully gets it up to Sierra, the platform is dropped unevenly and it comes crashing down on Kelly’s head, blood instantly seeping through her buff. Jeff instantly stops the challenge and calls in Medical to take a look at her forehead. Of course, he has to keep the blindfold on her, or else he may compromise the integrity of the challenge. Because there’s nothing more important that maintaining the integrity of a challenge when you’re in the running for 10 eggs. But, he assesses it’s just a superficial wound and she’ll be okay to finish the challenge, so Bush Doctor bandages her up and clears her to continue.

Jeff recaps everything for us: Blue has 3 items hoisted, White has their 3rd item on the platform, and No Collar has their 4th item hoisted. We’re back under way…

No Collar continues to outshine and gets their last item and then their flag. The communication between Joe and girls is great as they dominate this challenge throughout and win the big reward – 3 egg laying hens and a rooster. In the battle for 2nd place, White Collar has overtaken Blue and race out to retrieve their flag. They manage to get it up to Carolyn with minimal drama, thus, WC gets 2nd place and the eggs. BC gets a bloody buff…

6 thoughts on “SURVIVOR: WC vs BC vs NC – 3/18/15

  1. You know how I said the coconut creeper was the scariest guy this season? I TAKE IT BACK. Max totally grosses me out. The skeleton like teeth, the beard, the feet, the man junk hanging out in his undies, and the total dorky knowledge of the show is way too much. I concur though Dr. Fish, Jenn did tell him to put his (old man looking) feet in the pot. Hali who I am shocked is a law student (the snotty lawyer in me shudders at the thought) wins the new dumbest award due to her Jimmy Fallon EW face. Good thing she’s pretty. And I may be wrong but can you get planters warts from a pot of water that’s been reboiled before you even drink from it. I thought you got them from walking around barefoot in the gym. But then, I didn’t go to medical school, oh yeah, NEITHER DID SHE! As for Boston Rod, his comments actually didn’t bug me in the least. No, he’s not articulate but I think what he’s actually trying to say is men want women to be the better sex, the fairer sex. They want their wife to be good and sweet etc. Is that so bad? Just pat him on the head and move on. I thought his tattoo dig about Lindsey was kinda funny.

  2. I am tired of the blindfolded challenges. Is it going to take a death for this to end? After so many close calls with the falling platform, there needed to be a proactive solution, not yelling it is on you.

    I noticed the same bikini stain. At one point in her idol search(unstained) she looked as if she was pregnant.

    I did enjoy this episode more than previous ones due to more challengers, but still a bit bored.

    Who has the fishing gear now and why aren’t they catching ant fish?

    Is in in fat black guy’s contract to throw out at least stereotype every episode? (swimming, chicken, I know there have been others)

    Unless some idiot comes with the we need to throw a challenge scenario, it should be very one-sided.

  3. Enjoying your recaps!
    I am always amused by the guys like Rob and Dan that clearly have overly high views of themselves and think they are skilled in dealing with members of the opposite sex.

    Both are entertaining tools and make for fun tv. Rob sees no contradiction in trying to sleep with every girl at the club…while then stating that when he is ready to settle down he will be looking for “an Angel” uh…yeah…he will have to search outside his zip code if he hopes to find one he or his macho buddies haven’t deflowered already.

    And Dan…well…the way he says women should be handled is about 180 degrees off. I cannot believe that non-apology ever works for any woman. He could not have done any worse with Sierra.

    Shirin would drive me nuts in about a minute. Her brand of annoying naked skeevy crazy needs to have the torch put out ASAP.

    Enjoying the season despite these not being “the best players ever”. I’m into college football…but basketball is impossibly boring to watch. I’ll be glad when March Madness is over and it’s On with the Show!

  4. Folks! I’m gushing with pride over your comments. Thank you all for being so supportive and loyal…

    kinb – Maybe it’s just me, but isn’t there some other place Max could have stuck his feet for Dr. Jenn’s warty-pedi? Just sayin’… You’re right about Hali being pretty, I just wish we got to hear some of the smutty stuff too. Like, I just read that Sugar was boning JT before they went on H vs. V and we NEVER heard about that. And then when she got voted off first, she was possibly suicidal. I think religion permeates this show more than they let on, so we get a whitewashed version of reality star drama. And Boston Rod, while he may be a douche to me personally, I realize he’s got to be playing it up for the cameras. And if he isn’t, then why the f**k is he saying that stuff? I get the whole “machismo” thing, but I’m surprised no one’s told him to “shut it” or else he’ll seal his fate. (XO Kate)

    doc – Can’t wait for someone to sue the show so they get their shit together. Fun and games is great, but be responsible in how you run your show. And I’m with you on the fishing. Unless I was told there are sharks in the area, I’m in the water trying to catch fish every day. Even if you don’t catch any, you’re still in the water… And I agree about the blase episodes. Maybe the show just thought they’d get good episodes because they have (supposedly) great contestants. Uh, I think not. As a fan of the show, I wanna fall in love with every season, but the casting of the last 3 seasons has been lacking. Seriously lacking. And no one wants to admit it! It takes people outside the show to point it out, but our voices are never heard. Would be nice if they just admitted they underestimated their cast and “they’ll get it right next season.” But people in TV never do that. And take it from me, I’ve worked in Hollywood for 25 years…

    susie – XO kiss kiss!

    hath – Thank you! I think guys like Dan and Rod are funny cuz (I assume) this is their first real foray into television so they’re trying to get as much screen time as possible. I get that. But you still need to have a filter for what’s acceptable. I think a lot of contestants forget that MILLIONS of people are going to be watching their confessionals, so maybe they need to think before they speak.I think a lot of players see their time on Survivor as “play time” in preparation for their admittance into the “Reality TV Celebrity” world, but in truth, they’re just a bunch of dorks who got cast. As long as we fans continue to blow sunshine up their asses, they’ll feel like gods. So just treat them like a bartender at your local watering hole (a little nicer than you’d treat your waiter) so they don’t turn on you… Totally get you on Shirin. Would love for someone at Yahoo to “anonymously” fill us in on how she’s viewed at Yahoo. Trust me, you won’t be revealed…
    I’m still holding out for this season to get better. I keep thinking we’re repeating last season, where no one wanted to admit how bad it was until late in the season, but this one has promise. I think Kelly is getting an underestimated pre-merge. She’s got a head on her shoulders, but it depends on where she falls.She could win this…

    March Madess. There is no alternative. Stop watching other stuff…

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