SURVIVOR: BLOOD VS WATER FINALE – 12/15

We start out with an epic recapping of the major storylines of the entire season:

– survivors playing against – not with – their loved ones
– the emotional toll felt when choosing to either swap or not swap
– the Colton debacle
– the drama at Redemption Arena (tension, challenges, goodbyes)
– Laura’s return to the game
– Ciera turning on her mom
– the individual paths that each remaining player has undertaken

Kasama camp, Night 35: Returning from Tribal, the usual “that was tough, you did what you had to do, no hard feelings, it’s just a game” banter goes on. Did we expect anything less? It’s pretty much been that way every time so no action here. Ciera knows that she’s on the fringes of the tribe right now, but she knows that whoever re-enters the game will be on her side, but…math tells us that it’ll still leave her down 3-2 unless Immunity necklaces are won or some major moves are made.

Tyson tells us that he’s got to take to Monica to the end to seal a victory, so he’ll do whatever it takes (even giving her his hidden immunity idol, if needed) to keep Monica around. So he essentially offers it to her saying it’s her to use, but Monica’s a smart cookie, she knows that Ty-vase needs to keep her around. And since she can do math too, she knows that when someone returns from Redemption Island , it’ll be 2-2 (not counting Monica). So she’s going to bathe in the knowledge that she can play on both teams. And just like that, Monica has become a Survivor Bisexual…

We then see Hayden’s arrival at Redemption Island . He’s welcomed with open arms, but you know those ladies are thinking, “Damn, I wish it was Ciera!” He’s got a lot to catch them up on, since they haven’t been privy to any of the drama that’s unfolded at the last 2 tribals. He tells Laura that Ciera won today’s challenge, which may have given her just the dose of maternal pride that someone needs before they have to endure a final Redemption Arena challenge. We’ll see about that…

Hayden tells us that he likes his chances against “two grandmas” which sounds worse than it is. This game does reward the strong, but somehow the show always seems to find a way to balance the scales. I wonder what they have in store…

And it’s all about balancing! How’d that happen? Maybe this is the show’s way of proving that their challenges are fair. Maybe not, but it sounded good… So, immediately I’m thinking, “What would it take to be good in this challenge?” Strength? Sure, can’t hurt. Balance? Yep. Got to be able to stay on one leg for a long time. Stamina? No doubt. But who’s got all three?

Immediately, 2 things are apparent. 1) Laura is not the challenge monster when it comes to balance, and 2) Jeff never shuts up… I swear, if I’m there, I’m telling him “STFU, Jeff, so I can concentrate…!” But, it’s his show, and I’m sure he’s doing it on purpose to mess with their minds.

Laura pulls off one of the most incredible saves I’ve ever seen as her vase somehow stays on the scale while she’s hopping on her platform. She almost looks like a carnival shill who’s there to simply draw in more suckers. “Come on and try your luck. Only ten dollars! See if you can balance a vase…” Nevertheless, she pulls off the miraculous save and stays alive…

But then Hayden is done in by a drop of sweat in his eye, as he goes to wipe it out. I guess Big Brother is a tad harder, because I don’t think anyone’s ever been voted off that show due to a drop of sweat. Really, Hayden? Regardless, his vase crashes down and he’s the next jury member on The Tribe is Right!

Laura immediately implores Tina to “let her have it.” But Tina won’t have any of that garbage (and honestly, WHY WOULD SHE?!). What an incredibly selfish and ridiculous request to make of Tina. “No way, sister,” Tina tells her…

So after 30 minutes of dueling in the hot sun (temperatures looked to be around 113 degrees) Tina recovers from a wobble, some leg quakes, and then Laura returns to her “bunny-hop” method. But, evidently, that’s not the way to go, and Laura’s vase goes crashing to the rocks below. Honestly, how many of you thought that Tina would reenter the game?

And with some nice parting words from Hayden about returning to his family and Kat, he leaves. Jeff then asks Laura if she feels like her time on the show was a success or a failure, and she says what I think is the wrong answer to teach our kids: If you don’t win, you failed. Jeff picks up on that right away, and only after Ciera comes to her mom’s defense and lets her know how proud she is of her, does Laura feel vindicated. Yeah, maybe Laura should have just said that she tried her best… With that, Laura throws her buff on the pyre and joins the jury.

Tina is then given the opportunity to keep the hidden immunity clue or give it to someone else. And we know that Tina’s a player, so she’ll keep that parchment.

Back at camp with the 5 remaining players, the battle lines are clearly drawn so there’s no need to run off and hide to read the clue. Tina knows that Ciera is her only ally at the moment, so she has no problem reading it with her. Trouble is, once they head off to the only tree that it should be in, it’s obviously not there anymore, so the ladies return to camp.

With Tyson gone to find some bananas, Tina and Ciera use the opportunity to approach Monica to see if she’d be willing to go to Final Tribal in an “All Moms” package. Monica is at least open to hearing what they have to offer, but Tina’s delivery is a bit abrasive, which doesn’t sit well with Ciera, who’s evidently figured out how to communicate with Monica. You need to appeal to her ego, be nice, and help her make the decision on her own. I’ll give her props, at least Ciera is thinking about the communicative process…