SURVIVOR: BLOOD VS WATER – 10/30/13

We open with a quick recap of last week but there’s nothing to report here. Aras and Vytas are on the chopping block, and Kat put her paw in her mouth one too many times and now she’s an emotional train wreck. It’s not that she’s falling apart yet, but give her 12 hours and I’m sure she’ll be driving the crazy train…

Next morning, Day 17, and guess who’s crying on the beach…? (No, it’s not John!) It’s Kat! As expected, she’s completely distraught and wondering if she’s getting dumped at Redemption Arena. That would be awesome. The tribes come in and then the 3 competitors, and before Jeff can introduce the challenge, Hayden stands up and says,

“Uh, Jeff, can I say something to Kat? Look babe, I know we’ve been having a great time since I won Big Brother. Spending all that cash on snowboards, tanning lotion and a surfboard… But this new twist in our relationship has made me wonder if you can handle the tough things in life. Like puzzles, and social media and interviews… I think we need to break up…”

Now, I’ve already touched on how insane and incredibly insecure she is, but then again, who knows what happens when you’re on the island for that long? Former players always make it seem like “you don’t know how tough it is unless you’ve played the game,” but something tells me I’m not that out of line for ripping Kat on how her boyfriend will view her current predicament. Perhaps there were some cracks in that relationship that pre-existed coming on the show? Don’t need to delve too deep in someone else’s relationship, but it’s possible this is something they brought to the island.

Off to Redemption Arena we go and we’re given a glance at the challenge that waits. You can see it involves some kind of puzzle, so I’m immediately thinking that Laura M. and John have an advantage. This does not bode well for Kat. To make matters worse, as soon as she enters the arena she breaks down and needs a hug just to get her head straight. Come on, Kitty, get your game face on! Not exactly sure she has the fortitude to make it in this challenge/show/relationship/social media spotlight…

She tells us what we already know about what she’s feeling and of course Hayden says she’s crazy for thinking that way, and that their relationship is fine. Well, Jeff doesn’t like happiness on his island, he likes drama, damn it! So let’s challenge Hayden to come swap places with Kat. Whaddya say, pal…? And don’t let Kat’s puppy-dog eyes (mixed metaphor much?) sway your decision. What say you, Brother?

And then comes the biggest bunch of bulls**t I’ve seen this season. Kat says they should switch, but Hayden throws out the “what’s better for us long term, baby?” and of course that means, “I can win, you can’t. Just stay there and lose and I’ll win this game for the both of us.” But come on, Kat, you actually gotta make your man go through that? Putting him on the spot like that? Just own up to the fact you’re riding his coattails in this relationship and take your medicine. Do your best but know you never had a chance to win this game in the first place. This beach just ain’t your cat box, kitty Kat…

The challenge involves untying some knots and using a machete, but it’s all about the fire puzzle the competitors have to assemble. Jeff tells us it’s the same one that Cochran did in Season 26 so I guess that just tells us the Challenge Department saved a few bucks on their budget this week.

As they get under way, all three get to the puzzle rather quickly with John having a slight advantage. He starts to solve the puzzle while Laura M. simply uses the strategy of looking at John’s puzzle for hints. Kat can’t figure out how to open the bag to spill out the puzzle pieces so I’m thinking she’s about to have another breakdown. Thankfully, when she actually gets to the puzzle, she starts to make some progress after spinning her wheels for a bit. As expected, John makes quick work of the puzzle aspect and finishes first. The race is on for second.

Kat’s biggest issue with the puzzle isn’t the difficulty of it, but the ethics of looking at someone else’s. “That’s cheating,” she says. “No, it ain’t,” says Jeff. “It’s your game….” (whatever that means…). So after a change of heart, she starts making progress by looking at Laura’s but she’s pulled too far ahead, and is really just better at puzzles. She coasts to a second place victory as Kat can’t seem to figure out to make any more pieces fit. Kat is toast… And of course, she immediately begs Hayden not to break up with her!!! Seriously? I would dump a girl like that just for how insecure she’s coming off. Have some balls, lady. So after burning her buff, she walks off and remains ball-less and exits the beach.

This means we get our weekly dose of “let’s have Monica burn the clue John gives her?” This is so freaking annoying considering everything I said last week about not giving up any power. I think John is just too tired to put any creative thought into this decision now. He could probably devise some kind of rationalization for giving it to Vytas, but he doesn’t even want to try. He’s just a “creature of habit”… I’m thinking at this point, the “Hidden Immunity Clue writing department” doesn’t even bother writing anything down anymore. They just tie a string around a piece of paper and give it to Jeff.