Let me start off by confronting the lady who called me a douche in the comments of my last blog. If I may, can I ask you to email me with your intrepretation of what a douche is and why someone who thinks a person is a douche would continue to support (in a sense) said douche? I’m not being rude, I’m just trying to understand why, if someone dislikes another human being, why they would want anything to do with that human being they don’t like. In this case, you think I’m a douche, so why read my blog? I was a Psychology major in college, so these kinds of things interest me. For instance, I don’t like tomatoes. I stay away from them. If they’re ever placed on a burger or sandwich that I purchase, I take them off immediately and throw them away. I’m never going to grow them in a garden (if I ever choose to have a garden), I’m never going to buy one at a store (unless I plan on throwing it at someone’s face), and I’m certainly never going to eat one just to say I ate one. Do you see what I mean? I just would like to know why it is you think I’m a douche for trying to be funny in a blog I write about a silly reality competition show, and why you choose to continue to read my blog? Just open for a debate is all. Email me, please.
Now that that is over, let’s get to the show.
Malcolm and Denise get back to the Matsing camp a beaten pair, down from a tribe of 6 to a tribe of 2, ten days into the game. But, just like Malcolm said, you can’t count them out just yet. You never know what tomorrow is going to bring, and you have to assume that tomorrow is going to bring them a new tribe, where they can have new standing, actually attain a victory in a challenge, and maybe even form an alliance that will help them outwit, outlast, outwhateverthehelltheotheroneis. So, I’m not counting you out, either.
One thing that tomorrow did bring them was the Idol. After a feverish search, brought on by the thought that they may not ever be coming back to their camp, since they were both assuming they were going to be split up and placed on other beaches. The funny thing about them working together to find the Idol is the idea behind who gets it if they do find it? I know it was Malcolm’s idea to use the machete to pry off the Idol, but what if it were Denise’s idea to begin with, and Malcolm just was the one to find it? Whose would it be then? The old brain vs. braun argument. Is it the persons whose idea it is, or the person who actually carries out the idea? But, we didn’t have to settle that age old debate this time around, because it was both Malcolm’s idea, and doing.
At the Reward challenge, Malcolm and Denise are both told they will be joining another tribe, by random draw. Malcolm draws the Tan Dong tribe, while that leaves Denise over at the Kalabaw end of the draw. If I’m Tan Dong, I’m pumped, because Malcolm is the obvious choice to take from those two. Not taking anything away from Denise, because I think she is a great competitor and a very smart person, but in the game of Survivor, I believe Malcolm has more to offer.
Ah, too bad Angie still isn’t around to see what Probst has for the winning tribe: COOKIES!!! I’m sure that b*tch would have gobbled them suckers up like a homeless person gargling vodka for dinner. In the end, Tan Dong wins and Penner tells it how it is – they got screwed with the addition of Denise and how they’re now at an extreme physical disadvantage with Tan Dong having Malcolm, Pete, Artis, and Skupin compared to Kalabaw’s fat and out of shape Penner, a broken down Jeff Kent, and a younger, skinny kid, Carter. I’d say any physical challenge is going to sway in the favor of the Long, Strong, and Tan Dong.
Hi! Just wanted to drop in and tell you I love your recaps! I think your really funny and I look forward to reading your blogs each week. I will be checking out your website and I am sure I will love that just as much. Nothing wrong with a little raunchy humor, doesn’t make you a douche… did you ever hear back from that poster who called you that? Anyway – keep up the good work!
Great recap – I laughed so hard when you mentioned Katie and the cookies!
OK, I’ll admit that I’m now actually interested in continuing to follow the show. I feel an affinity with Denise. She’s a strong competitor and keeps herself low-key – no drama, no tears, no stupid comments.
The good thing about having Malcolm and Denise each joining one of the remaining tribes is that we’ll finally start getting to know those tribe members better.
OK, OK, Scott. Stop begging! I’ll check out your tvonthedaily site!
Cheers to my fellow survivor fans!
I can’t figure out how to e-mail you but please let me break this down for you, I used “douche” as a term of endearment. Me and all my friends use it, “You look great douche!” “Douche are those new shoes?” See? Okay, that’s not true I don’t really use the douche as a term of endearment and I used it in my comment with the intent to be funny. Funny fail; however, I do like you, but I don’t like tomatoes, and I find your writing witty and intelligent. I apologize for the unfunny.
Great recap! I also laughed out loud at “COOKIES”!
I assume when most people leave the game they just watch their torch get snuffed and then walk out, but I wonder if any shake hands with Jeff, hug him (not awkwardly), etc..but it just ends up on the cutting room floor? What a weird exit for Dawson!
Regarding Katie’s dress…I read a few years ago that the contestants are required to wear attire from their “everyday lives”. I always wondered prior to knowing that why people would not wear layers or even long sleeves.
Your doctor story reminded me of a terrible joke that may not be a joke at all, but a true story of someone who visited your same doctor…
What did the doctor say when the patient said, “It hurts when I lift my arm”?
-Don’t lift your arm
Thank you brady6, I appreciate you reading and thinking I’m that funny! Best part about that is that I AM THAT F*CKING FUNNY!!
FanOfSteve, either you change your name to FanOfScott and start begging all of your friends to come visit my site on a daily basis, or I don’t think I can consider us friends anymore.
susieduck, I’m glad you at least reached out, even if it wasn’t through email. I make the same mistake you make ALL the time, thinking people who read my emails/blogs/texts are able to hear my sarcasm through that text! I get myself in trouble too often with people for that same reason, so I completely understand. I will take you calling me a douche as a badge of honor!!
As for you, beaner, I laughed just reading your name!!
But … but … SCOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTT!!! I chose my username before you ever started blogging!
Now what am I gonna do?!
*SOB!*
[Did you enjoy the drama?]
You are hilarious – crack me up!
I’m glad they didn’t vote out Denise – she deserves to stay around. I hope she can hang on for awhile.
Who the heck is Dawson? I don’t think I ever heard her name before – Katie either. We really needed this so we could learn something about the other tribes.
Great recap Scott!