SURVIVOR: ONE WORLD – 4/26/12

April 26th, 2012 | 3 Comments | Posted in Survivor 24 - One World

Anyway, Kim wins the reward, chooses Alicia and Chelsea, which pisses Kat off to no extent and gives Troy the opportunity to point out that those are the “top three” in hopes that it sparks something in the other three women sitting on the bench next to him. Good effort, Troyzan, but like I said before, these girls are idiots. Well, Christina is willing to hear you out, but she’s useless. Enjoy being voted out at the end of this show. Do I really have to sit through 40 more minutes of this just to find out you are going to be voted out? Can we get to the girls’ oiling themselves down already? And, don’t f*ck with me, CBS, put the Chelsea rub down scene in slow motion. I’m making you money by watching this show, so the least you could do is oblige me with a slow motion, oil rub down scene. My birthday is in August, so let’s call it a birthday present.

Does anyone even care about the reward scene? Other than the fact that Chelsea played grab-ass with Alicia’s leg the entire helicoptor ride, was there anything else that came out of this part of the show? Hell, they didn’t even give them real food to eat. They got cookies and bread. Congratu-f*cking-lations, you three. Let me eat this other half of my Jimmy John’s sandwich while you enjoy that chocolate chip cookie! Sure, one of you may win a million dollars, but in case you don’t, suck on that!!

Back at camp, Troyzan works on Kat to the point where he makes her cry! She’s crying because Troyzan won’t shut up about how those girls are the final three and “that’s not true.” Of course it isn’t, Kat. Of course it isn’t. Just like how the timeshares you sell are a great idea to purchase. It’s called book a hotel, dummies. You don’t need a timeshare. Stop thinking you’re cool because you have money to throw around and want to be able to tell people you “own” a timeshare with 342 other people who piss all over the toilet seats and have sex in every inch of the house without cleaning up after themselves. Enjoy eating on the kitchen table that has Alejandro’s semen ingrained into it. A little extra salt never hurt nobody, right?

Oh, and you SHOULD fear that you will be viewed as a weak player, Kat. That is because YOU ARE!!

When Kim returns from her reward, she pulls Kat aside to tell her that today was the worst day for her…aw, sh*t, I can’t do this anymore. Are we getting to the oil rub-down scene yet or not, dammit?!? These knuckledicks have no entertainment value left in them. They need to condense these episodes into 30 minutes when these people can’t hold one damn conversation that any of us would even care to listen to. I don’t even think I’d pay attention if they fondled each other while they were talking about whatever it is they were talking about.

And, then CBS answers back by sending a pig into the camp. That was the skinniest “wild” pig I’ve ever seen before. Do you really want me to believe that a “wild” pig scampered into their camp and just stuck around while these lunatic people surrounded it with a rope, an ax, and a tree branch? First off, Troyzan, that pig was not 160 or 170 lbs. That thing may have weighed 60 lbs at the most. And, the fact that the pig stood absolutely still while they surrounded it and those idiots STILL didn’t catch it just tells me even more that it’s one of the village farmers’ pets or something and CBS just told the contestants to pretend to try and rope it in. In fact, another main reason you know it was someone’s pet was the fact that these a-holes HAD A F*CKING AX AND STILL DIDN’T KILL THE PIG!!! I would have went all Piggy in Lord of the Flies and stuck that bastard’s head on a stick and made bacon and ham out of its legs, just like the girls that they would have!! Nice try, CBS. These people are boring as hell, we know that, but just because they’re stupid doesn’t mean we are.

Side note, the “i” button on my laptop seems to be working fine now, thanks for askng. Sh*t, there it goes agan.

At the Immunity Challenge, I get what CBS promised. Chelsea rubbing herself down with oil, while in just a bikini. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be, so after Troyzan loses in the first round, I fast forward through the rest, because, really, who cares at this point? If he doesn’t win, it doesn’t matter who does.

Kim does end up winning and that just about ensures Probst snuffing out Troyzan’s torch at Tribal later tonight.

3 thoughts on “SURVIVOR: ONE WORLD – 4/26/12

  1. You cracked me up this week. I didn’t watch until
    Saturday. Disappointed that Troyzan couldn’t pull it out. Looking forward to tonight.

  2. Where did my comment go?

    I thought for sure you would mention Kim’s mustache – my husband and I kept saying – look at that – Really? A model with a mustache? I’m not sure if it was bad lighting or what – but it appeared to be a mustache about 98% of the time they showed her interviews.

  3. Sorry, my computer was wigging out – I thought I was clicking on this week’s blog and it was taking me to last weeks (this one). I see the reply back on this weeks!

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