SURVIVOR: BLOOD VS WATER 2

Alrighty then, it’s 8:35p and I’m already late to the show! There was once a time that I wouldn’t miss the premiere episode of Survivor at 8pm, with a drink in one hand and a remote in the other. Now, I have a drink on a coaster, a DVR remote, my laptop, and two kids and a wife banging on the door…and there’s a strong desire to watch Clayton Kershaw win the division for the Dodgers. That’ll all have to wait. It’s time to jump into the Survivor bubble… Let’s all hold our collective breaths and jump together. Survivor San Juan del Sur, Blood vs. Water 2…here we come…

After a quick reminder of how emotional Blood vs. Water was – and honestly, it was a genius move on Survivor’s part to add the emotional element every single week – we see Jeff’s traditional helicopter intro as he flies over the various teams on the beaches below. Once again, the couples will be stranded for a night (Day 0) apart from the other teams, so they can use the provided flint practicing their fire-making abilities. As we’re introduced to each castaway, we see a few storylines unfold: Jon & Jaclyn don’t want to be viewed as the “pretty perfect couple,” Dale & Kelley have had a strained relationship, Keith and Wes are not the ones to trust with holding everyone’s passports, and John Rocker just wants to put the past behind him…by punching anyone who calls him a bigot!

The teams march in to what looks like Exile Island arena, or maybe it’s just some centuries old Spanish ruin the Location department stumbled across. As Jeff welcomes everyone in, he asks a few initial questions before the players are divided into tribes.

Coyopa (Orange)
Wes
Dale
Josh
Baylor
Jaclyn
Val
Alec
Nadiya
Rocker

Hunahpu (Blue)
Kelley
Jon
Keith
Julie
Jeremy
Missy
Drew
Reed
Natalie

And it appears the teams are fairly balanced, which is a nice start. I hate it when one tribe is clearly stronger/better/younger than the other, because it makes the game that much tougher for anyone on that tribe. In this case, the Hunahpu tribe seems to have a slightly “older” vibe to it, which may help those players align, but it could work against them in challenges. Speaking of, Jeff informs the tribes the first reward challenge is NOW.

One member from each tribe will have to untangle 2 rings from a long rope that’s wrapped around a log frame. They must use the rings (which are attached to the ropes) to retrieve a wooden “box” with hooks on it. One player from each tribe roshambo’s and Hunahpu wins, which means they get to choose who they’ll put up. Jeremy is very quick to volunteer for his tribe, which brings about the first twist in the game. This means that he has to go up against his wife. Jeremy is clearly troubled by this, especially once they find out that the loser of the challenge has to go directly to Exile Island, which clearly puts her/him at a disadvantage. So while Jeremy could help his tribe by winning flint and beans, he could be systematically hurting Val’s chances (and thus, HIS chances) in the game. Val is all fire and brimstone to play, so she’s good to go. Jeremy looks like he’s lost either way…

The challenge gets under way and while they’re even for a while, Val has some trouble climbing the wooden frame to untangle the rope that’s wrapped around a top beam. Jeremy is first to untangle the first rope and begins to toss for the box. With Probst’s motivation, Val is able to scale the frame and untangle her first rope and joins her husband tossing. (No, you did not just say that…!)

Jeremy retrieves the first box and hooks back in again. He quickly untangles the second while Val is still attempting to get her first box back. Soon after she retrieves it, Jeremy hooks his second box and hauls it back for the win. He’s already crying and you can see this is going to be another sob fest all season. As Jeff calls him over and asks for his take on beating his wife (stop it, NFL fans!) Jeremy is too broken up to reply. Jeff gives him the flint, and then gives Jeremy the next twist:

“Pick one of your tribe mates to go to Exile Island with your wife.”

And just when I thought I knew who Jeremy was going to pick, (“I’ll go, Jeff.”) He surprises me (or maybe it was the rules) and he selects Keith. And why, pray tell….?

“Because I know he can start a fire.”

Not sure if Jeremy knows that Keith is also a firefighter, the guys who PUT OUT FIRES, and not sure he knows that Keith and Wes lost their striker so they couldn’t make a fire, but I’m sure that’ll all come out on Exile Island. But now Keith is crying, and Wes is getting emotional, and the others are probably crying, and I’m sure somewhere John Cody and Dawn Meehan are crying…

The Hunahpuans find their beach/camp and take a look at all the possible tetanus risks they’ll need to avoid. Surprisingly, no one is diving into all the tool baskets looking for clue to an idol, but let’s give them another 5 minutes… The tribe breaks up and begins to build shelter and make camp, and Jeremy reveals in a confessional that he’s every bit as emotional as my man John Cody.

“Man, the guy’s back home are gonna kill me when then see this…”

But his game is not over yet, and Jeremy begins to search out alliances. He finds Kelley, who confirms she likes his vibe, and tells him she’ll stick with him, and hopefully their “teammates” will join them after the merge. Jeremy then finds Natalie who says she likes him and Kelley, and is down for an early alliance. He finds another ally in Missy, who’s “guydar” may not be so keen in marriage, but it may be acceptable in Survivor. She’s on board with Jeremy. And I’m already starting to wonder if the others in the tribe know what’s being plotted by their hero…

The Coyopans arrive at camp and are more interested in finding out how old everyone is rather than build a shelter. It’s clear there’s a youthful thing going on in this tribe, which is painfully clear to Farmer Dale. As the younguns go about trying to start a fire, Dale employs the old school method of using a magnifying glass (his eyeglasses) to succeed in creating fire. And yeah, I’m not so sure he broke his glasses on purpose to “double the magnification.” Methinks he just “pulled a Dale” and broke them accidentally. But we’ll file that away as a Production Secret…

At Exile Island, Val and Keith are surveying everything they’ve been given. Which isn’t much. It’s a barren beach, next to a grove of trees, which is at the edge of the jungle. As they look around to see what they’ve got, they notice a small camp with a stand. On it are 2 urns with instructions for each castaway to “Choose one.” They do, which provides a small scroll that they open in front of each other. Keith’s is blank while Val’s mentions a clue to a hidden idol back at each camp. Rather than sharing that Intel with Keith (which she could have done since the clue obviously applies to either camp) she decides to change the subject and check out some other items lying around. Kind of shitty, but that’s Survivor. Keith understands, and realizes he’s already on the short end of the stick, so he chats up Val and is happy to learn that Jeremy is a firefighter too. I’m sure that will bode well for him when he returns to the
Hunahpu camp. Perhaps Keith’s time on the island will last a little bit longer based on the random choice made by Jeremy…?

Back at Hunahpu, while some of the tribe is cooling off in the ocean; Drew and Jon are working hard building the shelter. Drew is particularly impressed with the job that Drew is doing, since he’s “never done this before.” He’s coming across as the “young dumb guy” that Julie is quick to point out. And since she’s been with Rocker for so long, she’s a resident expert on that.

Over to Coyopa and Rocker is sharing some quality time with Wes. The young firefighter (from Louisiana) is a huge Atlanta Braves fan, and is pretty sure that he’s in a tribe with John Rocker. And after a humorous back and forth where Rocker tries to hide his identity, he comes clean, but asks Wes to keep it under his hat. John had previously revealed in his Intro video that he may try to eliminate anyone who recognizes him too fast, so he may have Wes in his crosshairs. Or maybe he’d be a good ally? You know, the last time I checked, Survivor is a game that’s won by making alliances and winning challenges, so I’m wondering why Rocker would want to get rid of an ally AND a strong tribe mate. But I won’t question the decision making abilities of John Rocker. He clearly knows the best way to handle adversity…

Day 3 and something’s wrong at Coyopa. Josh’s eye is inflamed and he can’t figure out why. The only guess he has is that the branches they’ve used as a roof over their shelter may be infected with poisonous sap! Killer tree sap! Needless to say, Josh’s eyes are now as red as those very tony underwear he’s sporting… (and I don’t mean Tony…)

We’re then briefly given the reason why Team Jon & Jaclyn will be the most depressing team this season. Not only does Jon show us he wants to mate with the monkeys in the treetops above, he tells us that his father has an inoperable brain tumor and doesn’t have much time. So the decision to even be on the show was a tough one, only made possible by Jon’s father being such a huge fan of the show. And considering how long ago this season was shot, I’m wondering if Jon father is still around to see his son play. I hope he is.