SURVIVOR: BRAINS VS BRAWN VS BEAUTY – 5/14/14

Hello again, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the penultimate episode of “Brainiacs vs. Biceps vs. Boob Jobs.” Holy crap, it’s been a long time since I’ve used that phrase. I think the show decided to move away from using the “BvsBvsB” attributions since those labels were clearly erased weeks ago. What has it been since then? Methinks “Boneheads vs. BALD-Faced liars vs. Beefcake/Boobs” is a tad more a propos

Nice to see the Twittersphere is still super pumped on this season, with many calling it “one of the best seasons ever.” Jeff Probst continues to tweet about that, which says something because he doesn’t ALWAYS do that. And if you haven’t noticed, there seems to be a bit of a feud developing between Tony and Russell Hantz over Tony’s gameplay. Many have been comparing him to Russell, who obviously doesn’t take kindly to being compared to ANYONE. The man’s a trailblazer! There’s been some amusing back and forth between them, which is either a harmless little spat between two dominant players (in their respective seasons) or a precursor for something brewing for a future season. Can you say, Season 30 All-Stars…? We’ll see what the future holds for them…

I saw a couple days ago someone posted the question: Who’s playing the best game and why? I think that’s a valid debate, considering we’re down to the nitty-gritty, so let’s explore that a bit. Here’s my take on it, and let’s just see if tonight’s episode will render my prediction false.

Tony – my obvious choice for player of the season, but the way he’s played leaves something to be desired when considering jury votes. He may be immune tonight, with or without a guaranteed shot at the finals, but do jury players simply reward the most devious, unscrupulous player the million dollars? Let’s ask Russell that question… Uh…no. I think juries hold more of a grudge toward finalists at how they were treated during the game than they let on, with many holding grudges far longer than the finalists think. I think Tony may fall a little short, only because he steamrolled through almost EVERYONE on the jury…

Woo – Tony’s right hand man and consigliere throughout the season. That is, after Cliff was voted out. Woo has been a guaranteed ally with Tony from the beginning. However, he’s remained jovial, approachable, and on good terms with everyone on the jury. That could be a powerful position, come final tribal. Woo’s biggest obstacle will be whether he can (“did”?) convince the jury that he actually DID ANYTHING. I compared him to Gervase last week, which would place him in the “shut out at final tribal column,” but this season is different (as they all are) and if he’s up against Tony and Kass, who would YOU give your vote to? My only question is how persuasive can he be at a final tribal? Is he Fabio or is he Gervase?

Kass – I think Kass has no chance to win. Her dislike from other players, general haughtiness, and “f**k you” attitude have sealed her fate. I can’t see anyone awarding a single jury vote to her based on the Ponderosa videos I’ve seen. The flipping, the conceit, it all comes back to burn you, and if she thinks THAT is the way to win, she’s been watching another show. I wrote last week she’s not playing to win, she’s just trying to not lose clients (or maybe gain a few) based on the way she’s playing A GAME. Either way, “the force is stupid in this one.”

Trish – A few weeks ago, someone told Parvati on the After Show to “watch out for Trish.” It may have been Sarah or Morgan, I can’t recall. At the time, I couldn’t see that at all, considering how she came off looking in the role she played in Lindsey’s departure. Trish just looked like an uneducated bully who was better at verbal confrontations than a real fight. Let’s just say it’s fortunate for her that Lindsey left. Now, after a few blindsides by Tony DESPITE her, I really don’t see how she could win the game. She could make it to the final and win by a “lesser of 3 evils” approach, but I hope not. I’m one of those viewers who think the winner should DESERVE it, and Trish definitely does not. Let’s see how tonight’s episode affects her standing.

Spencer – Based on Jeff’s prediction that he had “0% chance of winning” – which may end up being the biggest misdirect EVER on the show – Spencer’s ride has been a rollercoaster of near departures and miraculous 2nd, 3rd and 4th chances. Honestly, I can’t recall a player being thisclose to leaving so many times! Does that mean he deserves to win, no. Does that mean he deserves to lose, no. I keep reading on Twitter that Spencer deserves to win more than anyone but I just don’t see it. He hasn’t been controlling the game, he’s been scrambling. His one saving grace has been his performances in Immunity Challenges. And while that may have kept him alive until now, it’s not a coronation of a champion. I think his only chance is to make it to final against Woo and Kass and the only logical vote is Spencer.

Regardless of how it plays out, thank god this season is as unpredictable as the Filipino prison system because we’re one episode removed from the finale and I have NO IDEA who’s going to the final 3. Do you? I’d love to hear your thoughts on the final 3. Send your predictions to @BF_TheFish.

For today’s reveal of The Ranking’s of All Survivor Players, please skip to the end of the recap. I’m going to hold off on the top 4 until next week (sorry, I said top 3 earlier this week) but I think there should be a little drama in the final reveals. I hope you’ve been enjoying the List, and also the comments which may or may not have always been totally respectful. Oh well, you go on a reality show; you set yourself up for scrutiny. Deal with it…

Alright, let’s get into tonight’s episode entitled, “Straw That Broke The Camel’s Back,” so going in, I’m wondering what Kass is going to do to piss people off tonight. Let’s see what happens…