Welcome back to Season 28 of the Greatest Show on Television! I’m still Bryan Fischer and I’m back to recap every episode of Survivor: Cagayan, “Brawn vs. Brains vs. Beauty,” or as I’ve been calling it, “Brainiacs vs. Biceps vs. Boob Jobs. Not sure that’s who we’ll get, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed I’m accurate in one of those categories…
I trust you all had a great “off-season” but now it’s time to get back into the Survivor groove. I’ve actually been deluged with the show for a while now, like I mentioned in a Tweet a few weeks ago. I’m working on a huge project (shhh, it’s a secret) that involves going back and reviewing all 27 seasons of Survivor. So as I get reacquainted with all the great heroes, villains, winners, schmucks, afterthoughts, and challenges, it has reaffirmed one thing for me: this show is the greatest social experiment meets athletic competition meets physically draining experience on television. As I’ve reviewed how each season played out, I’ve come to determine there’s really no “rules” to how to win the game (sorry, Boston Rob…). Aside from the few contestants who have imploded (Sue Hawk, Ian, Osten, Ghandia, Janu, Erik, and so many more…) this game is simply the luck of the draw as long as you don’t step on a landmine.
This is why this season really intrigues me. One of the points Jeff touched on in his preview is that many of contestants playing this time have high IQs. I don’t think he’s only talking about the Brains tribe either. And another thing I noticed when watching the cast intros is how knowledgeable the contestants are about season’s past. I’m actually glad to see that because I want to see contestants who know the history of the show. I don’t need to see players who can recite every players’ name and tribe affiliation, but I do want to see good players playing the game, not some jerk who just wants to be on television and has no respect for the game (like some people who’ve played).
And that’s the one thing I want to keep in mind as I’m writing these recaps (and hopefully, someone is reading them!). This is a game, pure and simple. And every time Final Tribal Council occurs, it seems the one question that always comes up is, “How can you live with yourself at the way you played the game? Or “Haven’t you compromised your morals and integrity?” And that’s where I stand up and yell at my computer for the umpteenth time, “It’s a f**king GAME! Get over it.” When you play poker do you try to be the nicest player at the table? Hell no. You’re trying to win. That’s the justification for everything you do, whether it’s at the poker table (we’ll get to that later) or on Survivor. Plus, the fact that it’s being video-recorded means that reality is being checked at the door. So anything that happens should not surprise anyone. I just wish that one person would stand up at Final Tribal and say, “I lied to your face and you believed me. I stabbed you in the back and you let me. I beat you, so kiss my ass and give me your vote.”
Enough of my psychoanalysis of the show, let’s get down to business and see how quickly Spencer will get voted off…
Loved the recap – very funny and so true! When looking at the tribes before the show, I really thought the Brains tribe might have an advantage. Most are physically fit when they try out for Survivor, so the three tribes didn’t look like one was all muscles and the other two weaklings (a bunch of Cochrans or something) . . . but boy, those on the Brains tribe have GOT to be embarrassed. Who leaves the chick in the game who dumps out your rice? You think she’s going to put the crazy back into the bag? Once it’s out . . . it’s out.
Welcome back! I’m looking forward to this season – last night was like Christmas!
When Kass said ‘everyone thinks I’m the mom but I’m looking forward to backstabbing and blindsiding people’ I feel like she was playing with her ego and looking to make a point. There were a couple of times she would be telling the camera that she was willing to play two sides and maybe she wanted to be a bit of a villain? Again – ego-driven.
Maybe I’m grasping at straws but that’s the only way I can try to explain the psychology behind her bonehead strategy playing last night without conceding that yep, she indeed had a lobotomy prior to casting. She’s decided to keep the team as weak and crazy as possible and that gleeful grin she had as the second strong guy walked away last night was hella creepy. Good for you, Kass. Aren’t you the clever one. You have now decimated your own tribe and are the hot topic of conversation around water coolers today. *high fives* You’ve also chosen to flip onto an alliance with a lunatic. This would all make sense if you were Boston Rob and J’Tia was Crazy Philip… but you’re no Boston Rob, hon – and thinking you’re going to drag J’Tia to the end because nobody will vote for her is the dumbest idea ever in a game with three tribes where you will be chewed up and spit out way before the merge.
I do feel sorry for Spencer. He was by far the most likeable person on the tribe. I am pretty sure it’s going to rain buckets, people will be cold and shivering and J’Tia will be huuuungry and complaining. I give her a 70% chance of quitting outright before she gets voted off. Aside from Spencer, I do look forward to watching these people go down in flames. Brains? Even zombies would keep on walking if they stumbled across this sorry excuse for a Tribe.
Love the recap, I’m a self admitted all around Survivor junkie and I hope the show never ends. Funny, I thought the EXACT same thing when David picked Garrett as the weakest. Just say you thought he could beat the other two in a challenge, problem solved. People that worry about day 39 on day 1 never seem to make the right moves. Just like Jeff Kent’s obsession with getting rid of Penner cost him his game. I think Tony has a bit of Russell Hantz vibe, he seems really smart and strategic but I wonder if “spyshack” will get him voted off. I think Spencer still has a shot because they’ll have to vote out J’Tia soon and then the tribe will likely be absorbed with 3 members left. I’m looking forward to the season, 2 blindsides on the season premiere is a sure sign that these people have come to play. Any thoughts on what kind of special season they will have for Season 30? I’m hoping its good, and would like to see Russell get one more shot, dude is crazy but he makes great TV.
Thanks, everyone, for the supportive comments. Love to read them! A few thoughts…
(rsanon) Agreed. Whether it’s a game or not, when someone effs up THAT BAD, you have to get rid of them. Not sure if they could have switched her out on the puzzle part of the Immunity Challenge, but once she hit a wall, she should have stepped down.
(ericah) Welcome back! 😉
(ashleigh11) Good observation! I think you’re right about Kass playing with her ego. She already had a mini-alliance with Garrett and Spencer, so she was safe for another couple tribals. Don’t know why she would weaken her tribe on day 6. Stupid, stupid move… And I’m surprised that Spencer was coming across likable. In his intro video he came across as such a prick, even Probst was saying he had no shot in hell..
(kreger01) Just makes me wonder how dumbstruck players are on Day 1. That red light on the camera does make some people act the fool…
You’re right about Kent. Never liked his game (too full of himself) and his crosshairs didn’t bounce enough. You need to stay on a swivel and move your target based on what just happened. Targeting one person can’t be the best play. Unless they go batshit crazy and throw your food in the fire!
And yeah, Tony’s vibe is too creepy at this point. Like I said, you gotta make alliances. Does he expect to win on his own? Why ostracize yourself from the appointed “leader” of your tribe? Stupid…
Here’s what I hope they do on season 30: 3 tribes, Returning Favorites vs. 2 tribes of superfans. But I wanna see Favorites that got screwed when they played before somehow. I’ll have to think about that. I’m not a fan of Russell, I think the Hantz’s have overstayed their welcome on reality television. I could do with not seeing them anymore… Thanks for writing!
Kass & Tasha are idiots . I hope they lose again next week , & when the tribes merge they will be the first two gone