And…we’re back. It’s Survivor night again and I’m mentally preparing myself to hate Colton. Oh wait, no need to prepare myself for that, I already f*cking despise the kid. I think I’m actually hoping he doesn’t play as prominent a role in this episode, so maybe I can actually enjoy an episode of Survivor this season.
Before I get into the episode, I wanted to dispel Bill’s idea of a “struggling comic.” Has anyone else seen that new nation-wide commercial for freescore.com? If not, look for it and tell me who you see. Yes, it’s Bill. I don’t know about you, but when I hear “struggling comic,” the first thing that pops up in my head is not someone who has been on a nationally syndicated commercial, no matter what product it is for! Now, I’m sure he didn’t get paid millions of dollars to be in that commercial, but he’s definitely seeing some sort of paycheck from it. I’m fairly certain there are actual struggling comics, who are still paying clubs to let them perform, who would tell Mr. Bill that he is not struggling. He’s just an idiot who agrees to the idea of voting himself off Survivor. This has been a Public Service Announcement. Now back to our regularly scheduled blog.
We start off the episode with Troyzan telling the girls that not all the guys were into Colton’s idea. Yet, all the guys voted to go along with it? Seriously, what were these guys afraid Colton was going to do? Nobody was getting voted out and there was probably still another two days until the next Immunity Challenge, so you could have spent those two days talking his ass off the ledge…or just pushing his ass over. But, I don’t want to get back into that whole situation, because it just pisses me off even more.
I liked Alicia’s take on the situation when she said, “They just handed US a million dollars.” Is that right, Alicia? Did CBS not explain to you that YOU have to win the game of Survivor, not your tribe? In a few weeks, the two tribes will merge and become one. From there, you will compete in individual immunity challenges in an effort to win immunity so that YOU don’t get voted off. In the end, three people will be remaining, and there will be a jury that votes for ONE of those three players to win. It won’t be anything with US, just YOU! I feel like she probably still doesn’t understand this still. Good find there, CBS. And, goodness, this woman is a teacher. Like I said in my last blog, it’s not the kids that are what’s wrong with this world, it’s the people we have in place teaching them. I’m not saying all teachers are bad, but hell even my teacher readers can probably admit they work with some bad apples who shouldn’t be teaching. Anyway, Alicia’s not the brightest person to ever play this game. She does have a hell of an ass, though, so I guess she has that apple going for her.
We head on over to the Reward challenge, where Jeff tells the tribes that they are switching tribes. It will be a random draw. I was actually hoping they’d go the two captains route again, but whatever. At least that way, some people would know where their place is on their tribes from the get go and probably wouldn’t play like damn fools, believing every word this gay kid is telling you!!
Wow, really, letting Colton run the show, literally! I can honestly say if I was on survivor, I would be asked to leave the show because I would b*tch slap Colton’s @ss into the next ocean! I really hope his “act” is not how he is in real life.
Scott, I feel like I’m missing something…from your last paragraph I don’t know what you mean…maybe your referring to some spoilers for the next episode (I don’t look for them so I have no idea).
Not that I want to impose a political discussion because I think most people come here for the funny sarcastic commentary, and not a political debate, but I am struck by how what Colton is getting away with doing/being is quite reflective of how Republicans seem to as well, even though it all seems highly illogical and hypocritical….alls I’ll say is don’t do it America, don’t vote a republican (at least the ones that are in the running now) as your next president….all of us outside of America are watching…don’t do it! Don’t get me started on what they want to do to the already crumbling education system… Okay, I’ll stop.
On another note, I am obsessed with watching for Jeff’s blue shirts, and I’m convinced he’s totally doing on purpose now (so maybe he reads your blog!) because he’s worn the exact SAME blue shirt to every tribal council. Watch, now y’all will be obsessed too….I’m not on twitter, so maybe I’ll try emailing him or something to help you out! If you video tape the interview, you must demand he wears a blue shirt.
Oh, and when Alicia said they handed her tribe a million $, I think she just meant someone on her tribe – b/c it the guys were that dumb to sacrifice #’s then It would allow the girls to dominate and one of them for sure would win. Of course, that was before the shake up, which is probably why they showed that comment ‘famous last words’ and all…
What I don’t understand is how people like Michael let Colton order him around. When he said “Go get Lief.” a couple of episodes back, Michael just got up and left while Colton was reclining in the shade as if he were royalty. I would have said, “Go get him yourself, I am not your lackey.” The fact that he did it without comment makes me think that some of the men had a strategy to just go along with Colton and we were not aware of it. Afterall, this isn’t Big Brother. We don’t get to hear all the conversations, and the show is clearly heavily edited.
I love that Colton is on a tribe that he thinks “sucks”, because he clearly sucks the most. How stupid of them to send Monica home, and now Cristina knows she is next because she was just as confused as Monica.
Does the accident that happens on this week’s episode cause the show to end?