Anyway, it’s not surprising that Rick had a lead in the challenge and ended up coming somewhere near dead last as it turned into a race between Coach and Brandon. Which Brandon ended up winning. “Thank you, Jesus” he exclaimed from the mountain top. And so goes the brainstorm session from earlier about voting him out. But, Coach explains that he’s at peace with Brandon saving himself. He believes in divine intervention and that it wasn’t God’s will for him to go home tonight. Of course, he’s still pissed about it, but he’s at peace. Keep telling yourself that, Coach. I’ve long learned that people who need to tell themselves that they are calm and peaceful are mostly the ones who are not. Coach has demons just like everyone else does. He can do all the girly karate he wants on the beach, those demons aren’t going anywhere. But, as Coach explains, Russell really did a number on him, so maybe he should just give up playing Survivor.
Back at the camp, Coach and Sophie both agree that Albert is next to go. Sophie tells Rick and Brandon about the plan and Rick gets his big chance to tell them about how Albert approached him with the idea that they would go to the end together. Brandon went Loco about this and confronted Albert for being a liar. Albert ran around in circles with his penis tucked under his nutsack trying to get out of his lie, but the damage was already done and it was even evident to him that he was going home. So, he scrambled.
He scrambled to Brandon and hit him right where he needed to. In my mind, I don’t know why Albert didn’t just tell Brandon that the original plan for tonight was to vote Brandon, and that plan was concocted by Sophie and Coach. That wouldn’t have been a lie and would have been a MUCH bigger issue for Brandon than Albert telling Rick he wanted to go to the end with him. But, instead, he talks about how he feels his heart is closed to him right now and he starts talking about how he is human and makes mistakes, playing the forgiveness card. Brandon bites. And he bites hard. He tells Albert that he’s going to give him his necklace at Tribal. And then they pray. MC Hammer style.
Brandon tells Coach about his plan, which I think is stupid, but Coach gets all philosophical about it and tells Brandon that he is going to pray about it and ask God to tell him what to do. Coach goes and prays on the beach with a camera right in his face and says that while he prayed, he asked God to give him a name. And, God answered. Mostly because God has nothing better to do with his time than to talk to some moronic yogi on some beach, playing some stupid game on CBS. I’m sure God wants you to vote this person off. Well, considering who he voted off, I’m guessing God actually did answer his prayer and told him to vote this f*cker off.
We don’t turn to Survivor for a lesson in religion or morality. We don’t turn to it for comic relief. We tune in for the drama. And the most dramatic events are the social interactions and the competitions. What the producers need to realize is that we’ll be more compelled to watch with BETTER PLAYERS. Cast people who “get” the game and understand that’s it’s a competition for a million bucks and you’ll have a better Survivor. Let the yahoos (like Brandon) who aren’t interested in winning stay at home and watch. I’d rather see a season of smart, conniving, (preferably sexy) athletes, than a crew of pious boneheads. My humble opinion…
Hi Scott,
I’ve been a huge Reality Steve fan for awhile now and for some reason just now got an account. I read all your Big Brother recaps, have read all you Survivor recaps and I look forward to reading them when they come out. I appreciate your thoughts on the strategic aspects of the game. To me, that’s why Survivor/Big Brother are the best reality shows of all time.
That being said, can you please please PLEASE be a little less gloomy about this season. I’ve seen every single season of this show since it premiered when I was 11, and yes I know, this season’s nothing compared to some of the previous ones (my faves include last year’s Boston Rob sh*tshow, Fans vs. Faves and Australian Outback). BUT when I’m constantly being told how much this season sucks, it just makes it suck more :p Negativity brings people down. Sorry, I know I’m late on this comment, but maybe take it into consideration when you start up again with the next Survivor/Big Brother seasons 🙂
And my thoughts on last night’s episode…0_o huh? what a bizarre episode. Seriously, I’m a Christian, and I’m finding their use of faith just plain weird…and I can’t believe they’re bringing back Ozzy/Brandon after the next duel instead of at the end! Unless Ozzy comes back, wins every immunity and gets to the final, I’m not gonna be particularly pleased with whatever happens. That being said, I think Coach and Sophie deserve to win to SOME extent. Coach managed not to get overthrown to this point which is impressive, and I think Sophie’s gonna make some big moves in the finale. In the end, I think Sophie’s gonna take it.
Anywho, thanks again for being my Thursday morning entertainment! 🙂
I couldn’t agree more about how boring this season is, and last nights preachy BS was about my breaking point. They need to rename this season Survivor: Zealots. I have no problem if people are religious, but these people are so obviously fake about it that it makes me ill. Brandon may actually mean it, but he is such a whiny nut job that it makes it even worse. Heres hoping Ozzy can win out the immunity challenges.
I am totally with you! I waited each time for Jeff to see his shirt again, just to see if it changed from blue. When Coach and Loco had their little disagreement I almost pee’d my pants with Coach was doing an interview and Brandon just waltz’s on up there. I have never seen that before in survivor, I thought it was some code or something, don’t walk up on other people’s interviews! You make me laugh through this non-eventful season. It will be good if Ozzy makes it to the finals!
@stina2bina, I have realized how negative I have been towards this season and I want you to know that I have been thoughtful about it, but I think it’s because I’m blogging about it. It’s so easy to just watch a show, have it be boring and forget all about it, but when you’re in charge of writing 3,000+ words about each episode, you start to get a little ticked off at the people involved when they suck at life! 🙂 So, I do apologize for being gloomy to an extent, but also do not apologize because it’s the truth. I don’t want to ruin Survivor for anyone, but I feel as if these idiots are doing it for us and it’s my job to call them on it! That being said, I’m a “negative” person as it is and it takes a lot to please me, so that’s why my blogs can get that way…I will try and do better, but they need to let the pretty girls stay longer! 🙂
Thanks everyone for the comments and I hope that you’ll all be back next season…
No thoughts about the immunity necklace falling off Skinny Albert as Brandon was making his exit – maybe God really is watching LOL! This is a totally boring season, as much as I dislike Ozzy, I’m kind of hoping he makes it to the end, he’s the only player left who has kind of been playing the game.
Hate to say I told you so, but I told you so 🙂 I never wavered from my prediction and they ended up dead on….See you next season 🙂