Written by:
Scott Ottersen
Email: ScottOttersen@yahoo.com
Facebook: http://facebook.com/ScottOttersen
Twitter: http://twitter.com/#!/ChokeOnMyBlog
Survivor is back! For all you who didn’t follow me on my Big Brother blog, my name is Scott Ottersen. I am 30 years old, married with a little baby girl, live in the suburbs of Chicago, and live to watch TV and discuss it with, well, myself really. I am a nice person (at least I tell myself that to feel better) but do admit that I can take it to extreme levels to get a laugh out of people. So, if you read this and think I’m being rude, I’m really not, I’m just trying to get you to laugh. So laugh, dammit! One last thing, feel free to email me, facebook friend me, tweet me, whatever. I respond to everything that comes my way, so bring it. I love hearing back from my readers and take on all criticism and praise, equally. With that all said and done, let’s get to it…”Come on in, guys,” as Probst would say. And, I will say that Jeff Probst is my favorite reality TV show host. Hands down.
We start off the show with Ozzy and Coach flying in a helicopter together, with Probst telling us that they are back for redemption. How fitting since this is another “Redemption Island” season. Anyways, Coach says he’s back to play with honor and integrity, which never gets you far in any reality TV show competition. So, good luck with that Coach, I’m sure you’ll be out early. And, Ozzy is back because he is pissed about being stabbed in the back during his last season. I’ll never get over Parvati doing that. And, I like Parvati. She was the prettiest girl to play Survivor…until this season!! Dude is sick in competitions, so I think Ozzy will do well, but he just needs to watch out for the blindsides once the merge comes around. He needs a solid alliance built up the first few weeks and to do his best to win that first individual immunity once the merge comes around (if he’s still here) and he should be good to go after that.
As we meet a few of the new contestants, we’re introduced first to a Law Student (who we later find out goes to Harvard) geek who wrote a “prize winning essay” on Survivor in law school. Uh, you’ll be gone. He does NOT look much for the physical aspect of this game, so I have a feeling he’s going to be on the chopping block as soon as his team loses, which will probably be partly in due to him performing worse than the women on the tribe.
We also meet Russell Hantz’ nephew. I’m not so sure being related to Russell is like being related to Hitler, but you feel what you like, son. Let’s just hope you have a bit of a better social game than your uncle did. That man wouldn’t know a compliment from his own turd in a pile of 50 turds.
As Probst lines up the new contestants, he explains to them that the tribes aren’t full yet. Two returning contestants are being reintroduced to the crowd, and the lady standing next to Russell’s nephew says to him, “I hope it’s not Russell.” What are the odds of that happening? Anyways, they learn it’s not Russell and that it’s Coach and Ozzy. Nobody seems overly joyous about these two, since admittedly they aren’t the ‘sexiest’ options to have brought back. Last year with Rob and Russell, at least that got people talking.
Now, we start to learn people’s names and all I saw next to Mikalya was “Lingerie Football Player” and it got me excited! Let’s hope she brought her uniform with her. I love me some football. Maybe that league has male cheerleaders and I can try out to be on the field. Don’t judge. Tell me you wouldn’t want to watch, from the sideline, a bunch of sexy women playing football in lingerie. Nip slip heaven, I’d imagine. And, since most of you reading are probably women, just think about guys like Justin Timberlake and Brad Pitt playing anything in their underwear with no shirt on. You wouldn’t want to be a cheerleader for that? OK, stop judging then.
Also, someone needs to tell Christine that it’s “Dragon Slayer,” not “Dragon Warrior.” And, way to paint a target on your back with the whole “They’re temporary players” comment. Good one. Let’s hope everyone else on your tribe feels that way, otherwise if they flock to Coach or Ozzy like last years’ tribe flocked to Rob, you’ll be the first out.
I love the chick who came in the suit. Whereas I can understand that she’s smart on some level for bringing that type of layered clothing to the island because it can get cold at night, you still don’t want to be stuck always wearing suit pants in the hot sun during the day when all you want to be is comfortable. She’ll be walking around in her underwear most of the time. Not that I’m complaining about that, I’m just saying these people should be smarter about the clothing they wear since they’re only allowed to bring whatever they can fit on themselves (although I like to think production allows them some backup options, because you do see some people wearing “new” items throughout the season).
Before Probst lets them go, he tells them the first challenge is about to take place. And, it’s Ozzy vs. Coach in the “Hero’s Challenge.” And, as the challenge moves on, it becomes apparent that the Upolu (that’s Coach’s tribe) is not great at teamwork yet. They are completely lost in this challenge. And so is Coach. Ozzy and his Savaii tribe end up winning in a landslide victory, earning them fire and a few other toiletries to help make life a little easier for them.
With the loss, Coach feels as if he’s going to be the first to go. It’s early Coach and you still have the Immunity Challenge to go, so don’t get too worried yet. Stick with Edna (the suit chick), who seems to like you.
Really enjoyed your Big Brother blog even though it was a season of boring hell, and am glad to see you will be recapping Survivor. The new Survivor season might be just good enough to wash the horrible taste of Big Brother out of my mouth. And, unlike BB, let’s hope they don’t vote out the Hotties at the BEGINNING of the season. BTW, you must still have BB on the brain because I noticed you used the term “evicted” when speaking of ousting someone, lol.
Love you from BB. This is the first season of Survivor I’ve watched. I wish you had commented on when Cochran (I think it was him) and a female were trying to open the coconut and Cochran said “I think it’s coming … I see some white stuff.” And then later during the tribal meeting he said “you don’t even have to rub me for me to come out” or something like that. I know those were easy ones and some people say it’s gross but I find it amusing when people like him don’t know how the things they say can be misconstrued.
hey there Scott, this is the first post I’ve had the pleasure of reading from you since I do not follow BB at all. I was wondering if you are going to be giving us some ‘spoilers’ much like Steve does?
I am going to admit that this will be my worst recap. I had to do this and the big brother finale at the same time, so I was flustered. As for missing things, I will blame that on it being the first episode and already having so much information to cover, I simply couldn’t get it all in. And, I noticed I used the term evicted when I reread it! Whoops.
As for spoilers, I will do my best to try and figure some out, but I just don’t see it happening. The finale is taped live so there is no way I can tell you the winner but maybe I can scrounge something up.
I am SO happy to see a Survivor recap on this site. I’ve watched since the very beginning and excited about reading this recap every week (one more thing to keep me entertained while at work). I think this cast is pretty interesting and one of the better first episodes this show has done. Makes me excited for the season. What do you think about the Redemption Island twist… I hope it works better than last season.
Finally… I hope that you don’t post any spoilers… This is one show I don’t want to know what happens, I love the suspense and excitment each episode.
Keep up the good work!
Chances are I won’t even come close to finding any spoilers so don’t worry.
As for Redemption Island, I like the idea but think they shouldn’t wait so long to have the person reenter.
Scott, thanks for the recap. I am so happy for a survivor recap. I totally love Jeff also. I have not watched Ozzy on suvivor and was pleasantly surprised at how Hot he is. Eye candy is always good. I thought Ozzy would vote out cochrane was glad to see he voted for Semhar. Fans of reality tv usually do a good job at predicting who will win survivor, if your looking for info. Lastly you did’nt make laugh, whats up with that??? lol
Good Job on the Recap.
I have been wondering this for awhile about Survivor maybe other people are in the know..
It’s about the clothes they wear. If they are chosing the clothes they are going to wear for the show (Scott mentioned the girl in the suit and the layering aspect) why wouldn’t they choose bathing suits/active wear? It seems like they are always wearing normal bras and underwear and not bathing suits which I would think would be more comfortable. Also, cargo pants or somethng like that would be better than jeans and suit pants I would think. Maybe they surprise them and say you have to wear that! no time to change before!
I’m not sure who I like on this new season yet. I didn’t get a great vibe from anyone yet….
I wish they would have brought back Philip. He was hilarious to watch!!
Hi Scott: Funniest part of the blog:
“Stacey the mortician completely botches her search when she searches inside a tree where the clue is and doesn’t find it. Well, we all weren’t born to be winners, Stacey, don’t worry about it. Thanks for playing. Maybe instead of using that stick, you should try and touch something here and there. You’re used to touching DEAD PEOPLE’S FACES and you’re telling me that you didn’t want to stick your hand in that tree to look for something that might get you further in the game where you could win $1 million.”
Ha! Good job!